t I knew the worst hadn't happened. But they weren't paying much
attention to their work; they were just bending backward and forward and
screaming.

"L--l--look at him!" Grace Bentley just blurted out; "it's too
_excruciating_!"

I said, "Pee-wee, don't ever quote the handbook to me again. '_A scout
is kind._' You have deliberately murdered that poor omelet. Don't ever
say you don't believe in frightfulness."

"You make me tired!" he yelled. "Didn't you tell me the way
to flip--flop--didn't you say to catch--didn't you say to
toss--graceful----"

"I said to toss it up gracefully," I told him, "and to let it turn over
in the air and then to catch it _inside_ the pan. But tell me this,
_please_, so I can die in peace; what are you doing with the curling
iron?"

"He was going to open--he was going to open--a--a--can," the girl they
called Billie said, all the while trying not to laugh; "oh, dear me!"

"He wanted us to cut the chicken up to fr--fr--fr--fr--_fry_!" Grace
Bentley screamed.

"Oh, he's a regular cut-up," Connie told her.

"He sm--sm--_ashed_ the potatoes so they--oh, just look at them!" one of
the others managed to blurt out.

The kettle full of mashed potatoes looked as if a bomb had fallen into
it; there were gobs of mashed potatoes all around on the trees and
ground for about ten feet. It looked like a snowstorm.

"He flavored the onions with mosquito dope--cit--citronella," Pug Peters
shrieked.

"Sure," Wig said; "a scout is resourceful."

"You all make me tired!" Pee-wee yelled; "how can you flip when you
trip----"

"Walter," I said, very gentle and kind like, "take off your apron and
ask for an armistice. It's your only hope; unconditional surrender.
Here, give me the frying pan; look at the grease all down your leg,
you're a sight."

I began gathering up the gobs of omelet from his head and his shoulders,
while the girls sat on the ground all around and just laughed and
laughed. Honest, I thought Pug Peters would have a fit, she laughed so
hard. Grace Bentley nearly had hysterics.

"How can you--tell me this----?" Pee-wee yelled; "how can you
trip--flip--if you flop--I mean trip--you make me sick. That could
happen----"

"Sure, it could happen to Edison," I said; "you should worry. Get your
apron off and your face washed before some of us die."

Poor kid, he was a wreck. We washed him up and brushed and cleaned his
suit the best we could and collected all the odds and ends of ome