lump girl with black eyes, and somehow it spoiled the realism,
as I couldn't fancy he would really have cared so dreadfully for a girl
like that. Anyway, it put me out of the mood for reading any more
stories and I began glancing over the advertisements. At least, I
glanced at first, but soon I was absorbed; for they were wonderful.

I had never dreamed that there were such kind, thoughtful men in
business as the ones who advertised in those fat American
magazines,--and so clever, too; they seemed to have spent their whole
past lives simply in studying things, so that eventually they could
make you happy and save you trouble.

They lived only for that, those incredibly nice men. There were
photographs of some of them with their advertisements, so that you
could know what they were really like, and have even more confidence in
them than you would if you hadn't seen their style of features. There
were two or three whose profiles I could _never_ get to feel at home
with, even if I had been born with one of them; but the majority were
brave, energetic,--oh! terribly energetic-looking men, as indeed they
would need to be, if they were really to accomplish all the things they
promised, not only for you but for the hundreds of thousands of other
people who might be inclined to put them to the test.

There were things like this in the magazines,--all the magazines:

* * * * *

"Listen to me, Miss (or Madam). I have something to say which will
interest You. Do you want a Perfect Complexion? Don't move. Sit
still in your chair. Cut out this Coupon. Slip it into a stamped
envelope, and we will give You what You want by return of post."

"Why Suffer? You have Headache. We have the Cure. We ask nothing
better than to take away the One and give you the Other."

"Let us lend you a Beautiful Diamond Ring to wear till you are
tired of it. When you are, we will take it back, and return you all
but five per cent. of your money."

"Don't come to Us. Let us come to You, and bring You Something. You
have always Wanted Health, Wealth, Wisdom."

"We would like to give You some Friendly Advice. We don't want a
Red Cent for it."

"You are going to have a Party, and you are worried. Don't worry.
Just 'phone to us, and we will arrange Everything for you better
than you could yourself, with no trouble to you and your servants."