childhood. I must say, though, it's hard realizin'
they need anything of that sort when you're within reach of that Jack and
Jill combination. Most people seem to feel the other way; but, while
their society is apt to be more or less strenuous, I can gen'rally stand
an hour or so of it without collectin' any broken bones.

As usual, they receives me with an ear splittin' whoop, and while Jill
gives me the low tackle around the knees Jack proceeds to climb up my
back and twine his arms affectionate around my neck.

"Hey, Uncle Shorty," they yells in chorus, "come play Wild West with
us!"

"G'wan, you young terrors!" says I, luggin' 'em out on the lawn and
dumpin' 'em on the grass. "Think I'd risk my neck at any such game as
that? Hi! leggo that necktie or I'll put on the spanks! Say, ain't you
got any respect for company clothes? Now straighten up quiet and tell me
about the latest deviltry you've been up to."

"Pooh!" says Jill. "We're not afraid of you."

"And we know why you're here to-day, too," says Jack.

"Do you?" says I. "Well, let's have it."

"You're on guard," says Jill, "keeping us away from old Clicky."

"Old Clicky?" says I.

"Uh-huh," says Jack. "The goosy governess, you know."

"Eh?" says I, openin' my eyes.

"We call her that," says Jill, "because her teeth click so when she gets
excited. At night she keeps 'em in a glass of water. Do you suppose they
click then?"

"Her hair comes off too," says Jack, "and it's all gray underneath. We
fished it off once, and she was awful mad."

"You just ought to hear her when she gets mad," says Jill. "She drops her
H's."

"She don't do it before folks, though," says Jack, "'cause she makes
believe she's French. She's awful good to us, though, and we love her
just heaps."

"You've got queer ways of showin' it," says I.

"What makes Aunt Martha so scared of her?" says Jill. "Do you think it's
so she would really and truly murder us all and run off with the jewelry,
or that she'd let in burglars after dark? She meets someone every
Thursday night by the side gate, you know."

"A tall woman with veils over her face," adds Jack. "We hid in the bushes
and watched 'em."

"Say, for the love of Mike," says I, "is there anything about your
governess you kids haven't heard or seen? What more do you know?"

"Lots," says Jill. "She's scared of Marie, the new maid. Marie makes her
help with the dishes, and make up her own bed, and wait on herself all
the ti