inister of the gospel," exploded West, in his
most pompous tones. "I should like to know who you are and what all this
means?"

"Yes, parson, we understand who you are. We understand quite well, an'
we're agoin' to tell you who we are. We're a band of al-tru-ists! That's
what we are. We're _altruists_!" It was Jasper Kemp of the keen eyes and
sturdy countenance who spoke. "And we've come here in brotherly love to
exercise a little of that dynamic force of altruism you was talkin'
about. We just thought we'd begin on you so's you could see that we got
some works to go 'long with our faith."

"What do you mean, sir?" said West, looking from one grim countenance to
another. "I--I don't quite understand." The minister was beginning to be
frightened, he couldn't exactly tell why. He wished he had kept Brother
Tanner with him. It was the first time he had ever thought of Mr. Tanner
as "brother."

"We mean just this, parson; you been talkin' a lot of lies in there
about there bein' no Saviour an' no hell, ner no devil, an' while we
ain't much credit to God ourselves, bein' just common men, we know all
that stuff you said ain't true about the Bible an' the devil bein'
superstitions, an' we thought we better exercise a little of that there
altruism you was talkin' about an' teach you better. You see, it's real
brotherly kindness, parson. An' now we're goin' to give you a sample of
that dynamics you spoke about. Are you ready, boys?"

"All ready," they cried as one man.

There seemed to be no concerted motion, nor was there warning. Swifter
than the weaver's shuttle, sudden as the lightning's flash, the minister
was caught from where he stood pompously in that doorway, hat in hand,
all grandly as he was attired, and hurled from man to man. Across the
walk and back; across and back; across and back; until it seemed to him
it was a thousand miles all in a minute of time. He had no opportunity
to prepare for the onslaught. He jammed his high silk hat, wherewith he
had thought to overawe the community, upon his sleek head, and grasped
his precious sermon-case to his breast; the sermon, as it well deserved,
was flung to the four winds of heaven and fortunately was no more--that
is, existing as a whole. The time came when each of those eight men
recovered and retained a portion of that learned oration, and Mom
Wallis, not quite understanding, pinned up and used as a sort of shrine
the portion about doubting the devil; but as a ser