I was vexed with
what I regarded the nonchalance of my friend, and began to wish that I had
left him to go through his own affairs as he might. But reflection did
justice to his gallant spirit, and I mentally thanked him for having
relieved me from the life of an idler. At this moment my name was
pronounced by a familiar voice; it was Mordecai's. He had brought me some
additional letters to the leaders of the party in Paris. We returned to
the hotel, and sat down to our final meal together. When the lights were
brought in, I saw that he looked at me with some degree of surprise, and
even of alarm. "You are ill," said he; "the life of London is too much for
you. There are but three things that constitute health in this world--air,
exercise, and employment." I acknowledged to him my misgivings as to my
fitness for the mission. But he was a man of the world. He asked me, "Do
you desire to resign? If so, I have the power to revoke it at this moment.
And you can do this without loss of honour, for it is known to but two
persons in England--Lafontaine and myself. I have not concealed its danger
from you, and I have ascertained that even the personal danger is greater
than I thought. In fact, one of my objects in coming to you at this hour
was, to apprise you of the state of things, if not to recommend your
giving up the mission altogether."

The alternative was now plainly before me; and, stern as was the nature of
the Israelite, I saw evidently that he would be gratified by my abandoning
the project. But this was suddenly out of the question. The mission, to
escape which in the half hour before I should have gladly given up every
shilling I ever hoped to possess, was at once fixed in my mind as a
peculiar bounty of fortune. There are periods in the human heart like
those which we observe in nature--the atmosphere clears up after the
tempest. The struggle which had shaken me so long had now passed away, and
things assumed as new and distinct an aspect as a hill or a forest in the
distance might on the passing away of a cloud. Mordecai argued against my
enthusiasm; but when was enthusiasm ever out-argued? I drove him horse and
foot from the field. I did more, enthusiasm is contagious--I made him my
convert. The feverish fire of my heart lent itself to my tongue, and I
talked so loftily of revolutions and counter-revolutions; of the
opportunity of seeing humankind pouring, like metal from the forge, into
new shapes of society, o