he Ooh-jah,
while I give the Thing-a-me-tight a couple for his nob.

"See that?" he shouted at me. "Would you believe it? Easy as
winking. See, it was like this. The What's-a-name here, as kept the
Tiddley-um-tum in place, was sort of riding on the Squeak-box, so as the
Tiddley-om-pom and the other Jigger sort of gave the half-seas-over
to the Thing-a-me-bob and missed the Rum-ti-tum. Simple, ain't it,
Guv'nor?"

"Yes," I answered, "quite simple."

But I have decided to give up all idea of buying a car. I should never
learn the language.

* * * * *

LITTLE GREY WATER.

Little Grey Water, my heart is with you
In the loop of the hills where the lone heron feeds,
Where your cloak is a cloud with a lining of blue,
And your lover a wind riding over the reeds.

Little Grey Water, I know that you know
What the teal and the black duck are dreaming at noon,
And the way of the wistful wild geese as they go
Through the haze of the hills to keep tryst with the moon.

Little Grey Water, folk say and they say
That the homing hill-shepherd, benighted, has heard
A song in the reeds, 'twixt the dawn and the day,
That was never the song of a breeze or a bird.

But I know you so silent, so silent and still,
And so proud of your trust that you'll never betray
What the fairies that gather from Grundiston Hill
Tell the stars before morning to witch them away.

W.H.O.

* * * * *

[Illustration: FAITH RESTORED.

MR. PUNCH. "STANDS ROBERT WHERE HE DID? GOOD! I WAS AFRAID FOR A MOMENT
THAT MY IDOL HAD FEET OF CLAY."]

* * * * *

ESSENCE OF PARLIAMENT.

_Monday, June 2nd_.--The Lords seldom sit _die Lunae_, and were perhaps
feeling what humbler folk call "rather Mondayish" at being summoned from
their week-end pleasaunces to put the Local Government (Ireland) Bill
through its final stages. Anyhow they developed some eleventh-hour
criticisms. The sad case of the Belfast Water Commissioners attracted
Lord STUART OF WORTLEY. There are fifteen of them--one each for the
existing wards. But under the Bill Belfast is to be divided into ten
wards; and fifteen into ten won't go, even in Ireland. Lord PEEL
considered that while Lord STUART'S arithmetic was impeccable his fears
were exaggerated. If Belfast drinks its whiskey neat it will not be for
want of Water Commissioners.

In the Commo