nd kissing her). Good-morning, Aunt Tabitha. Your
chair is waiting for you. (He conducts her to it.)

MISS FARRINGDON. I'm a nasty cross old thing before lunch, Mr.
Wentworth, so I don't come down till afterwards nowadays. Is Gerald
being as charming as usual?

WENTWORTH (smiling). Oh, pretty well.

GERALD (looking at her lovingly and then turning to WENTWORTH). It's
having a very bad effect on her, this morning seclusion. She's supposed
to be resting, but she spends her time trying to think of nasty things
to say about me. The trouble with a mind like Aunt Tabitha's is that it
can't think of anything _really_ nasty.

MISS FARRINGDON. The trouble with Gerald, Mr. Wentworth, is that he goes
about expecting everybody to love him. The result is that they nearly
all do. However, he can't get round _me_.

GERALD. It isn't true, Wentworth; she adores me.

MISS FARRINGDON. He wouldn't be happy if he didn't think so.

WENTWORTH (gracefully). I can sympathize with him there.

GERALD. The slight coolness which you perceive to have arisen between my
Aunt Tabitha and myself is due to the fact that I discovered her guilty
secret a few days ago. For years she has pretended that her real
name was Harriet. I have recently found out that she was christened
Tabitha--or, anyhow, would have been, if the clergyman had known his
job.

MISS FARRINGDON. My great-nephew, Gerald, Mr. Wentworth--

GERALD. _Nephew_, Wentworth. I agreed to waive the "great" a long time
ago.

WENTWORTH. You'll excuse my asking, but do you never talk to each other
except through the medium of a third person?

MISS FARRINGDON (to GERALD). That's how they prefer to do it in the
Foreign Office. Isn't it, dear?

GERALD. Always, Aunt Tabitha. But really, you know, we both ought to
be talking to Wentworth and flaking after his mother and his liver--and
things like that.

MISS FARRINGDON. Yes, I'm afraid we're rather rude, Mr. Wentworth. The
Farringdons' great fault.

WENTWORTH (protesting). Oh no!

MISS FARRINGDON. How _is_ Mrs. Wentworth?

WENTWORTH. Wonderfully well, thank you, considering her age.

MISS FARRINGDON. Dear me, we met first in 1850.

GERALD. All frills and lavender.

MISS FARRINGDON. And now here's Gerald engaged. Have you seen Pamela
yet?

WENTWORTH. Not yet. I have been hearing about her from Tommy. He classes
her with the absolute rippers.

GERALD. Good old Tommy!

MISS FARRINGDON. Yes, she's much too good for Gerald.

GE