I look back at that sermon now it must have
been pretty vealy, but I was well pleased with it then, and my host
praised it so enthusiastically on the way home that I felt tolerably
sure of an invitation to occupy the rectory.

"My host had a bright little five-year-old daughter, and she and I got
to be pretty good friends. While I was waiting for the depot wagon to
come and bear me away from the scene of my triumph, the next morning,
the little girl suddenly ran up to me with her little tin savings-bank.
The dear little thing wanted me to open the bank and take one-half of
the money for myself. I thanked her and declined.

"What makes you think I need the money, dear?" I asked.

"Why, nuffin much, only when papa came home from church yesterday I
heard him tell mamma that you was a _mighty poor preacher_."

TEACHER. "Astronomy is a wonderful science, Harry. Men have learned
through it not only how far off the stars are from the earth, but what
they are made of."

HARRY. "It seems to me a great deal more wonderful how they found out
their names."

PAPA. "Are you sorry you hit Wilbur?"

BOBBY. "Yes, papa, and he is sorry too."

A GENEROUS LAD.

"Tommy!"

No answer.

"Tom-mee!!"

"Well?"

"What are you doing to your brother Willie?"

"Nothin'."

"Yes, you are. You are making him cry."

"No, I ain't--I'm bein' generous. I'm givin' him half o' my
codliver-oil."

A VERY GOOD REASON.

"Wisht I was a codfish," said Jack.

"Why do you wish that?" asked his mother.

"They don't have to take codliver-oil. They're born with all they need
already inside of 'em," said Jack.

End of Project Gutenberg's Harper's Round Table, October 1, 1895, by Various

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