ss.
In middle-age he becomes obese, and cannot go the pace as formerly.
His friends therefore abandon him, and he dies before he is fifty, in
reduced circumstances, of an enlarged liver.

* * * * *

"JOHNNYKIN AND THE GOBLINGS."

[Illustration: Bon Voyage! et Au Revoir!]

Two hundred and fifty Goblings in the Grand Banquet room of the Hotel
Metropole assembled, as all the world knows by this time, to bid
"Farewell, but not good-bye," as CLEMENT SCOTT's admirable verses have
it, to JOHNNYKIN; that is, to Mr. J. L. TOOLE, usually and popularly
spoken of as "JOHNNIE TOOLE," and generally endeared to his private
friends as, simply, "JOHNNIE." Quite the best specimen of a "JOHNNIE,"
among all the "Johnnies" of the present time. _Mr. Punch_, for the
first time in his life, permitted his merry men, The Knights of His
Own Round Table, to convert their usual Wednesday dinner into a
"movable feast," and to transfer it to the day beforehand, in order to
do honour to the unique occasion, and the exceptional guest of the
evening. No wonder there were two hundred and fifty acceptances to the
bill of fare, and two hundred and fifty more ready to sign, seeing
that the invitations came in effect from the President, the
Solicitor-General, who could not solicit in vain.

Mr. FRANK LOCKWOOD, Q.C., M.P., excelled himself in proposing the
toast of "The Drama." He contemned the ancient Greek Drama, but was of
opinion--Counsel's opinion--or, as he was speaking of the Romans,
"Consul's opinion"--that there was "more money in the Latin Drama."
_Mr. Punch_, regretted he was not at his learned friend's elbow to
suggest, that an apt illustration of the truth of his remark might be
found in the success of AUGUSTUS DRURIOLANUS, IMPERATOR.

Mr. HENRY IRVING proved, by his perfect recital of CLEMENT SCOTT's
verses, how thoroughly "by heart" he had got them. HENRY's "heart is"
_not_ "dead" when JOHNNIE is concerned. Sir EDWARD CLARKE, as we
learnt from the speeches made by himself, Mr. IRVING, and Mr. TOOLE,
seems to have been at school with all the leading Actors; and it was a
miracle that he escaped the attractions of the sock and buskin. Pity
that the song, "When we were boys, Merry merry boys, When we were boys
together," had not been arranged as a trio for them. JOHNNIE was in
his best form; very detached, casual, and uncommonly funny. Lord
ROSEBERY apologised by letter for not being able to be in Scotland and