buffeted about, till, hearing for certain
that he had died in an hospital abroad, I once more returned to my old
occupation; but have not yet been able to get my head above water: so,
madam, you must not be angry if I am afraid to run any risk, when I know
so well, that women have always the worst of it, when law is to decide.'

"After uttering a few more complaints, I prevailed on my landlady to go
out in quest of a lodging; and, to be more secure, I condescended to the
mean shift of changing my name.

"But why should I dwell on similar incidents!--I was hunted, like an
infected beast, from three different apartments, and should not have been
allowed to rest in any, had not Mr. Venables, informed of my uncle's
dangerous state of health, been inspired with the fear of hurrying me out
of the world as I advanced in my pregnancy, by thus tormenting and
obliging me to take sudden journeys to avoid him; and then his
speculations on my uncle's fortune must prove abortive.

"One day, when he had pursued me to an inn, I fainted, hurrying from him;
and, falling down, the sight of my blood alarmed him, and obtained a
respite for me. It is strange that he should have retained any hope,
after observing my unwavering determination; but, from the mildness of my
behaviour, when I found all my endeavours to change his disposition
unavailing, he formed an erroneous opinion of my character, imagining
that, were we once more together, I should part with the money he could
not legally force from me, with the same facility as formerly. My
forbearance and occasional sympathy he had mistaken for weakness of
character; and, because he perceived that I disliked resistance, he
thought my indulgence and compassion mere selfishness, and never
discovered that the fear of being unjust, or of unnecessarily wounding
the feelings of another, was much more painful to me, than any thing I
could have to endure myself. Perhaps it was pride which made me imagine,
that I could bear what I dreaded to inflict; and that it was often easier
to suffer, than to see the sufferings of others.

"I forgot to mention that, during this persecution, I received a letter
from my uncle, informing me, 'that he only found relief from continual
change of air; and that he intended to return when the spring was a
little more advanced (it was now the middle of February), and then we
would plan a journey to Italy, leaving the fogs and cares of England far
behind.' He approved