t night, I met a Tommy who
threatened to kill me because of his misery. I talked him down and
brought him to my room, and told him I really believed he would have a
great time in the future. I doubted what I said, but he believed me,
and went off to his billet happy for that one night.

[Illustration: XLI. _The Official Entry of the Kaiser._]

Could anyone forecast the tragedy that has happened to so many of
these men since? That great human Field-Marshal, Lord Haig, the man
who knows, works for them still, and asks--but who answers? Great God!
it makes one think, remember, think and wonder, what impossibly
thankless people human beings are. It is sad, but very, very true!

CHAPTER XIV (p. 098)

THE PEACE CONFERENCE

Captain Maude left Amiens and became Major Maude, D.S.O., A.P.M.
Cologne. I missed him greatly, and it depressed me very much being
left in that old town, but the doctors flatly refused to let me move,
so I just had to grin and bear it.

I then got more ill and took to my bed. My recollections from that
time to the middle of January are very hazy. People were very kind to
me, and used to come and sit with me for hours, especially two Rifle
Brigade boys--Stevens and Riviere--two of the best. Stevens had just
come back from Brussels, where there had been great times, music and
dancing. Apparently the great tune of that period was "Katie"; anyway
Stevens could not get it out of his head. He never knew how near he
was to sending me completely mad, by singing gently to himself as the
winter afternoons drew in:--

"K-K-K-Katie, beautiful Katie,
You're the only g-g-girl that I adore,
When the ke-moon shines on the Ke-cowshed;
I'll be waiting at the Kitchie Kitchen door."

Long afterwards, during the Peace Conference, whenever I heard that
tune in the "Majestic," my mind went back to the misery and
semi-darkness in that dirty room in Amiens.

On New Year's Eve, Angus McDonnell came all the way from G.H.Q. and (p. 099)
had me lifted out to dinner, so I must have been better then. General
Sir John Cowans also came all the way from G.H.Q. to see how I was.
Kindness is a wonderful thing.

[Illustration: XLII. _General Sir J. S. Cowans, G.C.B., etc._]

The Allied Press disbanded, and I gave a dinner to the boys at the
"Hotel de la Paix." It was all arranged by my chauffeur, Gordon
Howlett, and my batman, Green, and it was well done