e "passes" such as this.
Why should Scotch lads sit sighing
O'er the _Anabasis_?--
O'er the _Anabasis_?
XENOPHON's fiddle-de-dee?
Oh, for bonnie Doctor LAURIE,
I'd shout with three times three!

* * * * *

UNDER-LYNE'D.--Said Sir W. VERNON HARCOURT, at Ashton-under-Lyne, "I am
very glad to be enabled to come here from the hospitable roof of Mr. RUPERT
MASON." ... And again, "I have come here also from the roof of Mr. MATHER."
Quite a Sir WILLIAM ROOFUS! But what was he doing on the roof? Was there a
tile off in each case? Something wrong with the first house that a Mason
couldn't set right? And with the second, did Sir ROOFUS sing, "Oh dear,
what can the Mather be?" And why the invidious distinction between the two
roofs? The first being hospitable, and the second having no pleasant
epithet to recommend it.

* * * * *

PROPOSED NEW TITLE FOR LORD GR-M-TH-RPE.--Baron (H)ALTER EGO.

* * * * *

[Illustration: A LANCASHIRE WATERING-PLACE.]

* * * * *

POPULAR SONGS RE-SUNG;

OR, MISS BOWDLER AT THE MUSIC HALLS.

INTRODUCTORY.

DEAR MR. PUNCH,

In these progressive days earnest reformers, especially those of the London
County Council type, yearn to chasten and aestheticise the Muse of the Music
Hall, who is perhaps the only really popular Muse of the period. My name
gives me a sort of hereditary right to take exceptional interest in such
matters, though indeed my respected, and respectable, ancestor is not in
all things the model of his more catholic and cosmopolitan descendant. The
McDougall regimen would doubtless be a little _too_ drastic. To improve the
Music-hall Song off the face of the earth, is an attempt which could only
suggest itself to puritan fanaticism in its most arbitrary administrative
form. The proletariat will not "willingly let die" the only Muse whose
ministrations really "come home to its business and its bosom." No, Sir,
the People's Pegasus cannot, must not be ruthlessly consigned to the
knackers. But may it not be gently bitted, discreetly bridled, and taught
to trot or amble with park-hack paces in the harness of Respectability?

It is in this hope and faith that the following drawing-room versions of
some of "the most popular Comic (and Sentimental) Songs of the Day" have
been attempted by
Your respectful admirer,
VIRGI