in definite
relations with certain people, endowed with certain qualities, with
faults and fears, with hopes and joys, with likes and dislikes. Evil
haunts us like a shadow, and though it menaces our happiness, we fall
again and again under its dominion; in the depths of our spirit a voice
speaks, which assures us again and again that truth and purity and love
are the best and dearest things that we can desire; and that voice,
however imperfectly, I try to obey, because it seems the strongest and
clearest of all the voices that call to me. I try to regard all
experience, whether sweet or bitter, fair or foul, as sent me by the
great and awful power that put me where I am. The strongest and best
things in the world seem to me to be peace and tranquillity, and the
same hidden power seems to be leading me thither; and to lead me all
the faster whenever I try not to fret, not to grieve, not to despair.
"_Casting all your care upon him, for he careth for you,_" says the
Divine Word; and the more that I follow intuition rather than reason,
the nearer I seem to come to the truth. I have lately wasted much
fruitless thought over an anxious decision, weighing motives,
forecasting possibilities. I knew at the time how useless it all was,
and that my course would be made clear at the right moment; and I will
tell the story of how it was made clear, as testimony to the perfect
guidance of the divine hand. I was taking a journey, and the weary
process was going on in my mind; every possible argument for and
against the step was being reviewed and tested; I could not read, I
could not even look abroad upon the world. The train drew up at a dull
suburban station, where our tickets were collected. The signal was
given, and we started. It was at this moment that the conviction came,
and I saw how I must act, with a certainty which I could not gainsay or
resist. My reason had anticipated the opposite decision, but I had no
longer any doubt or hesitation. The only question was how and when to
announce the result; but when I returned home the same evening there
was the letter waiting for me which gave the very opportunity I
desired; and I have since learnt without surprise that the letter was
being penned at the very moment when the conviction came to me.

I have told this experience in detail, because it seems to me to be a
very perfect example of the suddenness with which conviction comes.
But neither do I grudge the anxious