farewell to _love_! Geoffrey her lover, Geoffrey her husband, Geoffrey
the father of her boys, was it a fact or a dreadful nightmare that he
had sat, untouched by her appeal, and confessed that ... that...

Joan winced, unable to bear the repetition, and locked her hands more
closely on her knee. Pixie glanced furtively through the window.
Stanor had turned back to the tennis-ground and the three-handed game
had been resumed. She stifled a pang of disappointment and sat quietly
waiting for further confidences, but presently Joan said quietly--

"Thank you, Pixie. Now--will you go? I want to think. You've been
very sweet."

"More bracing than sweet, my dear; but it was what you needed!" Pixie
rose with an alacrity which the other was, fortunately, too preoccupied
to notice, dropped a kiss on the lovely bent neck, and walked quickly
from the room. Joan had had the relief which her nature demanded of
giving expression to her feelings; now it was best that she should be
alone. Pixie had done her best to help, and now sunshine and Stanor
were waiting! In another five minutes she was playing tennis as
whole-heartedly as though it were her only business in life.

Meanwhile Joan sat alone in her upstairs room, struggling with all the
force of her ardent, undisciplined nature to brace herself for the
struggle which lay before her. Prayer had become of late a mechanical,
stereotype repetition of phrases; to-day there were no phrases--hardly,
indeed, any definite words. In the extreme need of life she took refuge
in that voiceless cry for help, that child-like opening of the heart
which is the truest relationship between the soul and God. She sat with
closed eyes and lifted face, penitent, receptive, waiting to be blessed.
For the time being doubts were forgotten, everything seemed straight
and plain. Then, being Esmeralda, the wayward, the undisciplined, the
mood of exultation faded, and depression held her once more. The
heavenly help and guidance seemed far-off and unreal. She was seized
with impetuous necessity to act at once, to act for herself. Pixie's
proposals failed to satisfy her ardent desires. To wait weeks or months
for the reward she craved was beyond endurance. She must contrive
something big, something soon, something that would demonstrate to
Geoffrey her anxiety to please him. She racked her brain to find a way.

Poor, impatient, undisciplined Esmeralda! How little she dreamed of the
tr