, stuck his feet on to a table, spit, and said to those in the
saloon:

"I thank my stars I am clean out of that one-horse town Albany!"

Another traveller who had joined the ship at the same town and who lay
huddled up in a corner more dead than alive after a severe attack of
typhoid followed by pleurisy, remarked:

"Well, you must admit, sir, it is the healthiest place in Western
Australia."

"Co-rect, stranger--co-rect," replied the Yankee. "Co-rect! guess that's
why I have cleared out. This darned Albany is 90 per cent. of climate
and only 10 per cent. of business."

[Illustration: SLEEPY HOLLOW.]

I visited Albany on my return journey. It struck me that in "Sleepy
Hollow" 90 per cent. of the natives were in bed and the other 10 per
cent. were dozing on the seats on the parade.

When I started for the Antipodes the place that I looked forward to
seeing more than any other was Western Australia. It is the part of
Australia most discussed at home, where it is being boomed with all the
artifice of the promoter's gang. Every ship brings living cargoes to
Western Australia; every newspaper is full of Western Australia. On the
front page are shipping advertisements offering every facility for quick
and cheap transit; in the centre of the paper leading articles appear to
ventilate the wonders of the West; towards the end of the paper--in the
City news--thousands eagerly scan the Stock Exchange for prices of
Western Australia. There is another column still in which one might find
interesting news concerning Western Australia--the deaths column.

When I arrived in Australia the one place that I determined nothing
should drag me to was Western Australia. No, not all the gold in the
mines would get me to that pestilential plague spot. Here is a place
boomed "at home" and abroad at the time of Queen Victoria's Jubilee,
when nightly speeches were made at banquets glorifying the charms of the
speculators' Eldorado, Western Australia--when columns were written of
its boasted civilisation, and cheers were given when "Advance Australia"
was roared out, and bumpers were drunk by the stop-at-home wirepullers.
Just read the following, published at the moment:--

"A WESTERN PLAGUE SPOT.

"HOW FEVER IS RAGING IN PERTH.

"Various visitors to Perth have expressed their opinions upon the
awful conditions, from a sanitary point of view, of the Western
city, and almost daily news is telegraphed across o