on. What do you call it? Albert, I
bet!"

"Oh, no, officer," the boy replied quickly. "I think too highly of my
King."

The German scowled and returned:

"I hope you don't dare to call it William."

"Oh, no, officer. I think too highly of my jackass."

NOTHING TO LOSE

An author has favored us with the following anecdote, which is taken
from the opening of a chapter in a forthcoming book dealing with the
war. It is another example of the pioneer character of ministerial
service with us. The varieties of opportunity are constantly changing,
but out in the front, according to the needs of our day and generation,
there stands the Unitarian with the equipped mind and the ready hand. "A
year ago, in London, a man originally from New York State came up and
spoke to me as a fellow-American. He wore the garb of a Canadian
officer. After I had answered his query as to what I was doing in
England, he said: 'My work is rather different. I am looking after the
social evil and venereal diseases in the Canadian Army.' 'Then you are a
medical man?' 'No, said he, 'I tried to get my English medical friends
to take hold of the work, but they said that they had their reputations
to look after. I have no reputation to lose. _I am simply a Unitarian
clergyman._'"

BAIT

When Mike Flaherty abandoned South Boston for Lynn and hired a cottage
with a bit of a back yard the first thing he did was to hurry back to
the Hub of the Universe and purchase a monkey. "Divil a wurrd" of his
scheme would he disclose to his old cronies in Boston. But afterward he
let out:

"'Twas like this: I chained the monk to a shtick in me yard, and the
coal thrains do be passin' all day foreninst, and on iv'ry cairr do be a
brakeman. In one waik, begorra, I had two tons of coal in me cellar, and
the monk never wanst hit."

BASEBALL "OVER THERE"

In a camp "Over There" the Turkish prisoners are allowed some freedom
and among other things our American boys introduced them to the game of
baseball. The Turks did remarkably well at it. One of them stepped up to
the bat one day, and taking it firmly in his hand turned to the east and
salaaming said in a reverent voice "Allah, assist thy servant." He then
made a three bagger.

The next player to the bat was an American boy who was not going to let
that Turk beat him. He also stepped up to the bat, clasped it firmly in
his hand, salaaming to the east said, "You know me, Al,' keeping up with
the Turk."