washin'-up. That
fair broke our backs. We 'ad a sort of seizure on parade and 'ad to fall
out till we got our breaths back.

* * * * *

THE RECOGNISED.

Give ear to my words and you shall hear
The song of the British Volunteer,
Who started out when the War began
As a middle-aged mostly grey-haired man.
Too old to be sent to join the dance
Of the doughty fellows who fought in France,
He refused to go on the dusty shelf,
And he set to work and he bought himself
A spirited grey-green uniform,
With a cap to match and a British warm,
And he took his fill
Of the latest drill;
But somehow they didn't seem to prize him
Or wish in the least to recognise him.

But now they have let him cast away
His excellent clothes of green and grey;
They think they can use him,
And don't refuse him,
And they've dressed him up and they've dressed him down
In a regular suit of khaki brown;
He has been gazetted
And properly vetted
As able to march five miles at least,
Though he puffs a bit when the speed 's increased;
And he can double
Without much trouble,
And do such deeds as a man must do
Who is willing to help to see things through.

* * * * *

A Wholesale Order.

"Lieut-Colonel ---- received the K.C.B. and other decorations, including
C.M.G.s, D.S.O.s, Military Crosses, and Royal Red Crosses."--_Evening
Standard._

* * * * *

From "Paris Theatrical Notes":--

"The programme for to-day at the Opera compromises 'Samson et
Dalila.'"--_Continental Daily Mail._

It sounds a little superfluous.

* * * * *

OUR BOOKING-OFFICE.

(_By Mr. Punch's Staff of Learned Clerks_.)

_Alfred Lyttelton: An Account of his Life_, by EDITH LYTTELTON (LONGMANS),
is a most fascinating book. Mrs. ALFRED LYTTELTON might perhaps have
contented herself with writing a formal biography of her husband. It would
have been difficult for her, but she might, as I say, have done it. Instead
of this she takes her readers by the hand in the friendliest manner and
admits them with her into the heart and soul of the man with whom she was
for twenty years associated. She shows him as what he was, a noble and
upright English gentleman, straightforward and tender-hearted, and b