the office boy,
comes in for his full share of the admonition. That his words were
appreciated was made evident to the lawyer by a conversation between
Tommy and another office boy on the same floor which he recently
overheard.

"Wotcher wages?" asked the other boy.

"Ten thousand a year," replied Tommy.

"Aw, g'wan!"

"Sure," insisted Tommy, unabashed. "Four dollars a week in cash, an' de
rest in legal advice."

While an Irishman was gazing in the window of a Washington bookstore the
following sign caught his eye:

DICKENS' WORKS
ALL THIS WEEK FOR
ONLY $4.OO

"The divvle he does!" exclaimed Pat in disgust. "The dirty scab!"

The difference between wages and salary is--when you receive wages you
save two dollars a month, when you receive salary you borrow two dollars
a month.

He is well paid that is well satisfied.--_Shakespeare_.

The ideal social state is not that in which each gets an equal amount of
wealth, but in which each gets in proportion to his contribution to the
general stock.--_Henry George_.

WAITERS

Recipe for a waiter:

Stuff a hired dress-suit case with an effort to please,
Add a half-dozen stumbles and trips;
Remove his right thumb from the cranberry sauce,
Roll in crumbs, melted butter and tips.

--_Life_.

WAR

"Flag of truce, Excellency."

"Well, what do the revolutionists want?"

"They would like to exchange a couple of Generals for a can of condensed
milk."

If you favor war, dig a trench in your backyard, fill it half full of
water, crawl into it, and stay there for a day or two without anything
to eat, get a lunatic to shoot at you with a brace of revolvers and a
machine gun, and you will have something just as good, and you will save
your country a great deal of expense.

"Who are those people who are cheering?" asked the recruit as the
soldiers marched to the train.

"Those," replied the veteran, "are the people who are not
going."--_Puck_.

He who did well in war, just earns the right
To begin doing well in peace.

--_Robert Browning_.

A great and lasting war can never be supported on this principle
[patriotism] alone. It must be aided by a prospect of interest, or some
reward.--_George Washington_.

_See also_ Arbitration, International; European War.

WARNINGS

Pietro had drifted down to Florida and was working with a gang at
railroad construction. He had been told to beware of