gin with, she took
subordinate work in the school where she had been a pupil; later, she
obtained the engagement at Dr. Tootle's.

An education of this kind, working upon Maud Enderby's natural
temperament, resulted in an abnormal character, the chief trait of
which was remarkable as being in contradiction to the spirit of her
time. She was oppressed with the consciousness of sin. Every most
natural impulse of her own heart she regarded as a temptation to be
resisted with all her strength. Her ideal was the same as Miss
Bygrave's, but she could not pursue it with the latter's assured calm;
at every moment the voice of her youth spoke within her, and became to
her the voice of the enemy. Her faith was scarcely capable of
formulation in creeds; her sins were not of omission or commission in
the literal sense; it was an attitude of soul which she sought to
attain, though ever falling away. What little she saw of the world in
London, and afterwards at her home by the sea-side, only served to
increase the trouble of her conscience, by making her more aware of her
own weakness. For instance, the matter of her correspondence with
Waymark. In very truth, the chief reason why she had given him the
permission he asked of her was, that before so sudden and unexpected a
demand she found herself confused and helpless; had she been able to
reflect, the temptation would probably have been resisted, for the
pleasantness of the thought made her regard it as a grave temptation.
Casuistry and sophistical reasoning with her own heart ensued, to the
increase of her morbid sensitiveness; she persuaded herself that
greater insight into the world's evil would be of aid in her struggle,
and so the contents of Waymark's first letter led her to a continuance
of the correspondence. A power of strong and gloomy description which
she showed in her letters, and which impressed Waymark, afforded the
key to her sufferings; her soul in reality was that of an artist, and,
whereas the artist should be free from everything like moral
prepossession, Maud's aesthetic sensibilities were in perpetual
conflict with her moral convictions. She could not understand herself,
seeing that her opportunities had never allowed her to obtain an idea
of the artistic character. This irrepressible delight and interest in
the active life of the world, what could it be but the tendency to
evil, most strongly developed? These heart-burnings whenever she
witnessed men and wome