s, in fact, juist--juist
damnable! Bankrupt--who is bankrupt? Is't me?" And the veins on the
Bailie's neck swelled visibly. "Tea at elevenpence-halfpenny! I never
had such trash in my shop. Three shillings is the lowest, and I never
recommended it. Whisky!--there is not a drop in the shop. Who dare say I
would turn this shop into a public-house? I'll be at the bottom of this,
though it cost me a thousand pounds. Who hired ye to carry round the
board, ye peetiful creature? If ye don't tell the truth I'll commit ye
to gaol this very meenute." And the Bailie turned the battery of his
wrath upon London John, who was greatly flattered by his own prominent
position, and not at all concerned about the Bailie's threat.

"It was," replied the Mercury of the Vennel, with great composure, "a
big, stout man like yirsel', Bailie, that gied me the boards and a
shillin'; or, noo that I think about it, he wasna so big, he was a
little man, and gey shilpit (thin) about the neck. Dod! I'm no very
sure, though, but that it was a woman wi' a red face and a shepherd's
tartan plaid; at ony rate, if it wasna her it micht be a bit lassie wi'
bare head and feet; and I'm thinkin' noo, Bailie, it was a bit lassikie,
for she said to me, 'Have ye ever been in London?' Noo, Bailie, I would
like to tell you about London." And if the police had not silenced
London John, the Bailie at that moment would have had a fit of apoplexy,
for it was evident that the trail was blind and there was no getting to
the real person behind London John.

The crowd had listened with considerable patience and self-restraint to
this conversation, but as soon as the hope of tea and refreshment died
away, and they realised that some one had fooled them, they looked out
for a victim, and settled upon the Bailie.

"Ye should be ashamed of yourself," and Tinkler Tam, standing out from
the midst of the crowd, and sitting as it were upon the bench sentenced
the Bailie in the dock. "It's a fine business to be playing tricks on
the poor folk o' Muirtown, wilin' them from their work to waste their
time at your shop-door and sendin' them awa' empty-handed. If it had
been the first o' April, and ye had been a laddie, I wouldna hev said
much aboot it; but at your age, and you a magistrate, to play sic a
trick, it's perfectly disgraceful. Ye ought to get a month's hard
labour, but aye thing's sure, ye'll no long be a Bailie o' Muirtown. It
was fearsome to hear ye askin' London John wh