the unusual experience of the afternoon, he did not listen, as he was
rather apt to do on common occasions, for the rest of the congregation,
this for Deacon Scott, that for Mr Wainwright, the other for some one
else, for whom it seemed a suitable portion; he listened for himself,
with his father all the while in his mind. And when it came to the
"result and evidence," he had not, for the moment, a word to say for
himself.

As for his father--well, his father had never made a public profession
of faith in Christ. He had "kept aloof," as the village people said,
whatever had been his reasons. But it came into Jacob's mind--moved and
stirred out of its usual dull acceptance of things as they seemed--that
to eyes looking deeper than the surface, his father's life might count
for more as "evidence" than his own profession could do. And as the
minister put it, would even his father's life count for much as
"evidence" of his being "risen with Christ?" Whose life would?

"Mine would amount to just nothing!" was Jacob's decision as he left the
house, when the meeting was over, and having got thus far it might
naturally be supposed that he would not rest until he got farther. He
had got thus far many a time before, but the cares of this world and the
deceitfulness of riches had done their part in the past to put the
thought away, and they did the same again.

But not so readily this time. For Jacob was unsettled and anxious,
longing for the help and counsel which his father could never give
more--longing also, but not always, for the help which he knew his
younger brother was capable of giving him if he would; and he asked
himself often, whether it paid even for this world, to wear one's self
out for the making of money which one might lose, as he had done, and
which all must leave, as his father was about to do.

But the day's work had to be done, and the day's cares met, and Jacob
found himself after a little moving on in the old paths, not altogether
satisfied with himself or his life, but pretty well convinced that
though it might be well to take higher ground as to some things, both in
his business and his religion, now was not the time for the change. And
besides, he also believed in "the diversity of gifts," as they were
pleased to term it in Gershom. If he could not lead a meeting, or speak
a word in season in private, as some of the brethren could do, he tried
to use his influence on the right side in all m