ch
occurrences must happen, sooner or later. The Americans apparently felt
the force of the satire, as the poem was widely reprinted throughout the
States. It subsequently returned to this country, embodied in an
American work on American manners, where it characteristically appeared
as the writer's own production; and it afterwards went the round of
British newspapers, as an amusing satire, by an American, of his
countrymen's foibles!]

The Congress met, the day was wet, Van Buren took the chair;
On either side, the statesman pride of far Kentuck was there.
With moody frown, there sat Calhoun, and slowly in his cheek
His quid he thrust, and slaked the dust, as Webster rose to speak.

Upon that day, near gifted Clay, a youthful member sat,
And like a free American upon the floor he spat;
Then turning round to Clay, he said, and wiped his manly chin,
"What kind of Locofoco's that, as wears the painter's skin?"

"Young man," quoth Clay, "avoid the way of Slick of Tennessee;
Of gougers fierce, the eyes that pierce, the fiercest gouger he;
He chews and spits, as there he sits, and whittles at the chairs,
And in his hand, for deadly strife, a bowie-knife he bears.

"Avoid that knife. In frequent strife its blade, so long and thin,
Has found itself a resting-place his rivals' ribs within."
But coward fear came never near young Jabez Dollar's heart,--
"Were he an alligator, I would rile him pretty smart!"

Then up he rose, and cleared his nose, and looked toward the chair;
He saw the stately stripes and stars,--our country's flag was there!
His heart beat high, with eldritch cry upon the floor he sprang,
Then raised his wrist, and shook his fist, and spoke his first harangue.

"Who sold the nutmegs made of wood--the clocks that wouldn't figure?
Who grinned the bark off gum-trees dark--the everlasting nigger?
For twenty cents, ye Congress gents, through 'tarnity I'll kick
That man, I guess, though nothing less than 'coonfaced Colonel Slick!"

The Colonel smiled--with frenzy wild,--his very beard waxed blue,--
His shirt it could not hold him, so wrathy riled he grew;
He foams and frets, his knife he whets upon his seat below--
He sharpens it on either side, and whittles at his toe.

"Oh! waken snakes, and walk your chalks!" he cried, with ire elate;
"Darn my old mother, but I will in wild cats whip my weight!
Oh! 'tarnal death, I'll spoil your breath, young Dollar, and your
chaffing,--
Look to your ribs, for here i