discreet Animals the Monkeys, who, as the _Indians_ tell us, can speak
if they would, but purposely avoid it that they may not be made to
work. I have hitherto gained a Livelyhood by holding my Tongue, but
shall now open my Mouth in order to fill it. If I appear a little
Word-bound in my first Solutions and Responses, I hope it will not be
imputed to any Want of Foresight, but to the long Disuse of Speech. I
doubt not by this Invention to have all my former Customers over
again, for if I have promised any of them Lovers or Husbands, Riches
or good Luck, it is my Design to confirm to them _viva voce_, what I
have already given them under my Hand. If you will honour me with a
Visit, I will compliment you with the first opening of my Mouth, and
if you please you may make an entertaining Dialogue out of the
Conversation of two dumb Men. Excuse this Trouble, worthy Sir, from
one who has been a long time

_Your Silent Admirer_,
Cornelius Agrippa.'

I have received the following Letter, or rather _Billet-doux_, from a
pert young Baggage, who congratulates with me upon the same Occasion.

_June 23, 1714._

_Dear Mr._ Prate-apace,

'I am a Member of a Female Society who call ourselves the _Chit-Chat_
Club, and am ordered by the whole Sisterhood, to congratulate you upon
the Use of your Tongue. We have all of us a mighty Mind to hear you
talk, and if you will take your Place among us for an Evening, we have
unanimously agreed to allow you one Minute in ten, without
Interruption.

_I am, SIR,
Your Humble Servant,_
S. T.

P. S. '_You may find us at my Lady Betty_ Clack's, _who will leave
Orders with her Porter, that if an elderly Gentleman, with a short
Face, enquires for her, he shall be admitted and no Questions asked._

As this particular Paper shall consist wholly of what I have received
from my Correspondents, I shall fill up the remaining Part of it with
other congratulatory Letters of the same Nature.

_Oxford, June 25, 1714._

_SIR,_

'We are here wonderfully pleased with the Opening of your Mouth, and
very frequently open ours in Approbation of your Design; especially
since we find you are resolved to preserve your Taciturnity as to all
Party Matters. We do not question but you are as great an Orator as
Sir _Hudibras_, of whom the Poet sweetly sings,

'--He could not ope
His Mouth, but out there flew a Trope.'

'If