ion is overrun. Tipstaff,
being a seventh son, used to cure the king's evil; but his rascally
descendants are so far from having that healing quality that, by a touch
upon the shoulder, they give a man such an ill habit of body that he
can never come abroad afterwards. This is all I know of the line of
Jacobstaff; his younger brother, Isaacstaff, as I told you before, had
five sons, and was married twice; his first wife was a Staff, for they
did not stand upon false heraldry in those days, by whom he had one
son, who, in process of time, being a schoolmaster and well read in the
Greek, called himself Distaff or Twicestaff. He was not very rich, so
he put his children out to trades, and the Distaffs have ever since been
employed in the woollen and linen manufactures, except myself, who am a
genealogist. Pikestaff, the eldest son by the second venter, was a man
of business, a downright plodding fellow, and withal so plain, that
he became a proverb. Most of this family are at present in the army.
Raggedstaff was an unlucky boy, and used to tear his clothes in getting
birds' nests, and was always playing with a tame bear his father kept.
Mopstaff fell in love with one of his father's maids, and used to help
her to clean the house. Broomstaff was a chimney-sweeper. The Mopstaffs
and Broomstaffs are naturally as civil people as ever went out of doors;
but, alas! if they once get into ill hands, they knock down all before
them. Pilgrimstaff ran away from his friends, and went strolling
about the country; and Pipestaff was a wine-cooper. These two were the
unlawful issue of Longstaff.

"N.B.--The Canes, the Clubs, the Cudgels, the Wands, the Devil upon two
Sticks, and one Bread, that goes by the name of Staff of Life, are none
of our relations. I am, dear Cousin,

"Your humble servant,

"D. DISTAFF.

"From the Heralds' Office,

"May 1, 1709."

II.--PACOLET.

From my own Apartment, May 8.

Much hurry and business have to-day perplexed me into a mood too
thoughtful for going into company; for which reason, instead of the
tavern, I went into Lincoln's Inn walks; and having taken a round or
two, I sat down, according to the allowed familiarity of these places,
on a bench; at the other end of which sat a venerable gentleman, who,
speaking with a very affable air, "Mr. Bickerstaff," said he, "I take
it for a very great piece of good fortune that you have found me out."
"Sir," said I, "I had never, that I know of, t