Two knives and forks, but neither fellows.
Item, a surplice, not unmeeting,
Either for table-cloth, or sheeting;
There is likewise a pair of breeches,
But patch'd, and fallen in the stitches,
Hung up in study very little,
Plaster'd with cobweb and spittle,
An airy prospect all so pleasing,
From my light window without glazing,
A trencher and a College bottle,
Piled up on Locke and Aristotle.
A prayer-book, which he seldom handles
A save-all and two farthing candles.
A smutty ballad, musty libel,
A Burgersdicius[2] and a Bible.
The C****[3] Seasons and the Senses
By Overton, to save expenses.
Item, (if I am not much mistaken,)
A mouse-trap with a bit of bacon.
A candlestick without a snuffer,
Whereby his fingers often suffer.
Two odd old shoes I should not skip here,
Each strapless serves instead of slippers,
And chairs a couple, I forgot 'em,
But each of them without a bottom.
Thus I in rhyme have comprehended
His goods, and so my schedule's ended.

[Footnote 1: Virg., "Aen.," ii, 5.--_W. E. B._]

[Footnote 2: Francis Burgersdicius, author of "An Argument to prove that
the 39th section of the Lth chapter of the Statutes given by Queen
Elizabeth to the University of Cambridge includes the whole Statutes of
that University, with an answer to the Argument and the Author's reply."
London, 1727. He was one of those logicians that Swift so
disliked.--_W. E. B._]

[Footnote 3: Illegible. John Overton, 1640-1708, a dealer in
mezzotints.--_W. E. B._]

PALINODIA[1]

HORACE, BOOK I, ODE XVI

Great Sir, than Phoebus more divine,
Whose verses far his rays outshine,
Look down upon your quondam foe;
O! let me never write again,
If e'er I disoblige you, Dean,
Should you compassion show.

Take those iambics which I wrote,
When anger made me piping hot,
And give them to your cook,
To singe your fowl, or save your paste
The next time when you have a feast;
They'll save you many a book.

To burn them, you are not content;
I give you then my free consent,
To sink them in the harbour;
If not, they'll serve to set off blocks,
To roll on pipes, and twist in locks;
So give them to your barber.

Or, when you next your physic take,
I must entreat you then to make
A proper application;
'Tis what I've done myself before,
With Dan's fine thoughts and many more,
Who gave me provocation.

What cannot mighty anger do?
It makes the weak the strong pursue,
A goose attack a swan;
It makes a wo