had followed defeat, until her thoughts were
all remorse. Those few hours of the past afternoon--dull enough while
she possessed them--returned to her memory only to make her feel how
much more they might have given. She had disappointed and deceived her
mother to obtain them, and what had they brought her? Nothing but an
intolerable shame and remorse.
Spiritually, she felt a prostration worse than death. She told herself
that she had prayed, that she had asked God to help her, and that he
had not done so. If God had so willed, it need not have been thus with
her. But alas! accusing God brought her no comfort; her conscience
continually reminded her of what she had done, and what she had left
undone--of her selfishness--her lost time--her idle languors--her
hypocrisy--her rebellion against God,--all these sins she realized,
and she hated herself for them.
Still, this very activity of despair was hopeful; for it is not
despair, but the sombre inertia of despondency, that is fatal to
improvement. It was the happiest thing in the world for Rose that she
was capable of being unhappy. For when she met with herself thus, she
felt the need of meeting with God. If she had suffered less, she might
have been content to leave God in heaven; but this utter sense of
misery and weakness made her at last fall humbly before "the Father
which is in heaven," and murmur, "Have mercy upon me!" And with that
prayer, she slept.
Very early in the morning Antony called on Mr. Filmer. But there was
no need to apologize for the hour. Mr. Filmer was possessed by the
necessity for rapid action, and he welcomed Antony the more warmly for
his promptitude.
"I am a lover, Mr. Filmer," said Antony, "and you know lovers run
ahead of the clock. I love Miss Filmer most sincerely, and I desire to
make her my wife. Of course, this desire implies the means to support
her in the position to which she has been accustomed, and I have
therefore brought you this schedule of my income to examine."
Mr. Filmer lifted the paper and read its contents with the caution and
respect the circumstances warranted. He laid it down with an air of
pleasure and astonishment. "This is an extraordinary record of
property for so young a man as you are, Mr. Van Hoosen."
"I have had extraordinary good fortune, sir. As you see, my share in
the hotel, of itself, insures Miss Filmer's adequate support; and I am
desirous to make over to her absolutely, for her own use in an
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