rning
home with their burden of honey sounded in my ears. It was there I
learned to enjoy the _levium spectacula rerum_, as he calls the story
of his airy tribes; and there in that great quiet of nature,--so wide
and solemn that it seemed a reproach against the noisy activities of
men,--I learned what the poet meant to signify in those famous lines
with which he closes his account of the warring bees:

These mighty battles, all this tumult of the breast,
With but a little scattered earth are brought to rest.

In this way Jack's father learned the illusion of life by looking back on
his happy days. I did not mean to fill my letter with this long extract
from his note-book, nor would I end with such ill-omened words. Dear girl,
I too have learned the deception of life in other ways. Teach me, when I
come to you, the great reality. In all O'Meara's memoranda after his
return to New York I could find only a single direct allusion to the woman
he loved. It was very brief: "On this day two years ago she said I made
her happy!"

Shall I bring happiness to you when I come?

A CODICIL TO LETTER XXXIV

JESSICA TO PHILIP. WRITTEN BEFORE THE RECEIPT OF THE PRECEDING LETTER FROM
PHILIP

Think of this,--I love you, but I do not know you. I only know your heart,
your mind, that part of you which meets me in spirit like the light from
some distant star that slips across my window sill at evening. But you,
oh! Philip, I do not know _you_. You are a stranger whom I have seen only
twice in my life. Do not be angry, my beloved, I do love you; but cannot
you understand that I must get used to the idea of your being some one
very real? These are thoughts forced upon me by your approaching visit,
and so I ask a favour: Do not tell me when to expect you. If you threaten
me with the identical day of your coming, I will vanish from the face of
the earth! But if you come upon me unawares, I shall have been spared that
consciousness of _confession_ face to face involved by a deliberate
welcome. And if you come thus, I shall not have time to retire behind my
instinctive defence against you. You see that I plan in your favour, that
I wish to be unrestrainedly glad when you come.

And about the kisses, you understand of course, dear Philip, that I am
incapable of determining them really! I only contemplated the possibility
when distance made it an impossibility. Still, you cannot fail to know
that I love