by that time
promised Mrs. Wynne that I would come, and I couldn't see that it would
be the right thing to chuck her. I thought the work would suffer if I
stayed at home, as she might find it impossible to get any other woman
who would pay her own way and consent to be away for so long a time. Our
prayers are always such childish things--prayer itself is only a
cry--and I remember praying that if I was "meant to stay at home" some
substitute might be found for me. This all seems too absurd when one
views it in the light of what afterwards happened. My vision of "honour"
and "work" seem for the moment ridiculous, and yet I know that I was not
so foolish as I seem, for I got a written statement from Mr. Hume
Williams (Mrs. Wynne's trustee), saying, "A unit has been formed,
consisting of Mrs. Wynne, Miss Macnaughtan, etc., and it has been
accepted by the Russian Red Cross." The idea of being in Russia and
having to look for work never in my wildest moments entered my head--and
this is the end of the "vision," I suppose.

_Russian Christmas Day._--Took a car and went for a short run into the
country. Weather fine and bright.

There is severe fighting in Galicia, and the rumour is that
Urumiyah--the place to which I am going--has been evacuated.

My impression of Russia deepens--that it is run by beautiful women and
rich men; and yet how charming everyone is to meet! Hardly anyone is
uninteresting, and half the men are good-looking. The Cossack-dress is
very handsome, and nearly everyone wears it. When the colour is dark red
and the ornaments are of silver the effect is unusually good. They all
walk well. One is amongst a primitive people, but a remarkably fine one!

_10 January._--I am taking French lessons. This would appear to be a
simple matter, even in Russia, but it has taken me three weeks to get a
teacher. The first to come required a rest, and must decline; the second
was recalled by an old employer; the third had too many engagements; the
fourth came and then holidays began, as they always do! First our
Christmas, then the Russian Christmas, then the Armenian Christmas,
leading on to three New Year Days! After that the Baptism, with its
holidays and its vigils.

There is only one sort of breakfast-roll in this hotel which is soft
enough to eat; it is not made on festivals, nor on the day after a
festival. I can honestly say we hardly ever see one.

With much fear and trembling I have bought a motor-car. No wo