yone thought. He came back often ... I thought only of
him. I said, very low:

"'Henry ... Henry de Lampierre!'

"Then they said that he was going to marry thee. It was a sorrow; oh,
Big Sister, a sorrow ... a sorrow! I cried for three nights without
sleeping. He came back every day, in the afternoon, after his lunch ...
thou rememberest, is it not so? Say nothing ... listen. Thou madest him
cakes which he liked ... with meal, with butter and milk. Oh, I know
well how. I could make them yet if it were needed. He ate them at one
mouthful, and ... and then he drank a glass of wine, and then he said,
'It is delicious.' Thou rememberest how he would say that?

"I was jealous, jealous! The moment of thy marriage approached. There
were only two weeks more. I became crazy. I said to myself: 'He shall
not marry Suzanne, no, I will not have it! It is I whom he will marry
when I am grown up. I shall never find anyone whom I love so much.' But
one night, ten days before the contract, thou tookest a walk with him
in front of the chateau by moonlight ... and there ... under the fir,
under the great fir ... he kissed thee ... kissed ... holding thee in
his two arms ... so long. Thou rememberest, is it not so? It was
probably the first time ... yes ... Thou wast so pale when thou earnest
back to the _salon_.

"I had seen you two; I was there, in the shrubbery. I was angry! If I
could I should have killed you both!

"I said to myself: 'He shall not marry Suzanne, never! He shall marry
no one. I should be too unhappy.' And all of a sudden I began to hate
him dreadfully.

"Then, dost thou know what I did? Listen. I had seen the gardener
making little balls to kill strange dogs. He pounded up a bottle with a
stone and put the powdered glass in a little ball of meat.

"I took a little medicine bottle that mamma had; I broke it small with
a hammer, and I hid the glass in my pocket. It was a shining powder ...
The next day, as soon as you had made the little cakes ... I split
them with a knife and I put in the glass ... He ate three of them ...
I too, I ate one ... I threw the other six into the pond. The two swans
died three days after ... Dost thou remember? Oh, say nothing ...
listen, listen. I, I alone did not die ... but I have always been
sick. Listen ... He died--thou knowest well ... listen ... that, that
is nothing. It is afterwards, later ... always ... the worst ... listen.

"My life, all my life ... what torture! I said