p). But not as I loved him! All these years I have not
been frittering away my love. Besides, I have had too high an ideal of
what loving and being loved should be; and just for that reason I felt a
deep desire to be loved--I can say so to you. And when love came, seemed
to take all my strength from me; but I felt I should always be safe with
him, and so I let him see it and gloried in his seeing it. That is the
bitterest part of it to me now--because he was unworthy of it. He has
said to me: "I cannot bear to see any one else touch you!" and "When I
catch a glimpse of your arm, I think to myself that it has been round my
neck--mine, and no one else's in the world." And I felt proud and happy
when he said so, because I thought it was true. Hundreds of times I had
imagined some one's saying that to me some day. But I never imagined
that the one who would say it would be a man who--oh, it is disgusting!
When I think what it means, it makes me ready to hate him. The mere
thought that he has had his arms round me--has touched me--makes me
shudder! I am not laying down rules for any one else, but what I am
doing seems to me a matter of course. Every fibre of my being tells me
that. I must be left in peace!

Nordan. I see that this is more serious, and goes deeper, than I had any
suspicion of. None of them understand it that way, Alfred least of
all. He is only hurt--distressed and hurt at the thought that you could
distrust him.

Svava. I know that.

Nordan. Yes--well--don't take up such a high and mighty attitude! I
assure you that is how it will appear to most people.

Svava. Do you think so? I think people are beginning to think otherwise.

Nordan. Most people will think: "Other girls forgive things like that,
especially when they love a man."

Svava. There are some that will answer: "If she had not loved him, she
might have forgiven him."

Nordan. And yet, Svava?--and yet?

Svava. But, uncle, do you not understand? I do not know that I can
explain it, either; because, to do that, I should have to explain what
it is that we read into the face, the character, the manner of the man
we love--his voice, his smile. That is what I have lost. Its meaning is
gone.

Nordan. For a while, yes--till you have had a breathing space.

Svava. No, no, no! Do you remember that song of mine, about the beloved
one's image? that one always sees it as if it were framed in happiness?
Do you remember it?

Nordan. Yes.

Svava. Ver