if British politicians could have refrained from
bidding for Irish votes. There was no alternative to it but complete
separation, and that was what Home Rule would lead to. Ulster did not want
the Bill, and would not vote for it; but, as the only alternative was the
Act of 1914, she was prepared to accept it as a _pis aller_, and to work
her new Parliament for all it was worth. At least it would enable her to
find schools for the thirty thousand Belfast children now debarred from
education. More than that, he was prepared to co-operate with any men from
Southern Ireland who were willing to work _their_ Parliament in a similar
spirit; and he paid a personal tribute to Mr. DEVLIN, whose courage he
admired though he detested his politics.

Thus there were gleams of hope even in his otherwise gloomy outlook, as the
PRIME MINISTER gladly acknowledged in winding up the debate; and they
probably had some influence in swelling the majority for the Bill, the
figures being 348 for the Second Reading, 94 against.

* * * * *

[Illustration: "PLEASE, MISTER, CAN I HAVE A PENNORTH OF CAMEL?"]

* * * * *

_POISSON D'AVRIL._

For the tragedy of which I am about to tell I consider that Brenda Scott is
entirely to blame. You shall judge.

There is a vacancy in my domestic staff, and the rush to fill it has been
less enthusiastic than I could wish. My housewifely heart leapt, therefore,
when, last Thursday morning, I espied coming up the drive one whom I
classed at once as an applicant for the post of housemaid. Nor was I
deceived. She gave the name of Eliza Smudge, and said she came from my
friend, Mrs. Copplestone.

My suspicions were first aroused by her extraordinary solicitude for my
comfort. "Outings" were entirely according to my convenience. And when she
added that she liked to have plenty to do, and that she always rose by 6
A.M., I began to look at her closely.

She wore a thick veil, and her eyes were further obscured by large
spectacles, but I could discern a wisp of rather artificial-looking hair
drawn across her forehead. And she was smiling.

Now why was she smiling? I could certainly see nothing to smile at in
rising at six o'clock every morning.

"I shall be free on 5th of April, ma'am," she was saying. "Let me see,
to-day is the 1st of April----"

The 1st of April! It came to me then in a flash--in one of those moments of
intuition of which even