on Solander's tomb would
not carry that far; it was not strong enough. So we went to the
executors of his estate and ran up against another snag--nothing in the
radio outfit in the tomb could be altered in any way whatever. That was
in the will. The same loud speaker had to be maintained, the same
wave-length had to be kept, the same makes of batteries had to be used,
the same style of tubes had to be used. Remington Solander had thought
of all that. So we decided to let well enough alone--it was all we could
do anyway. We bought the farms that were reached by the loud speaker and
had them surveyed and laid out in lots--and then the thing happened!

* * * * *

Yes, sir, I'll sell my cemetery stock for two cents on the dollar, if
anybody will bid that much for it. For what do you think happened? Along
came the Government of the United States, regulating this radio thing,
and assigned new wave-lengths to all the broadcasting stations. It gave
Remington Solander's endowed broadcasting station WZZZ an 855-meter
wave-length, and it gave that station at Dodwood--station PKX--the
327-meter wave-length, and the next day poor old Remington Solander's
tomb poured fourth "Yes, We Ain't Got No Bananas" and the "Hot Dog"
jazz and "If You Don't See Mama Every Night, You Can't See Mama At All,"
and Hink Tubbs in his funny stories, like "Well, one day an Irishman and
a Swede were walking down Broadway and they see a flapper coming towards
them. And she had on one of them short skirts they was wearing, see? So
Mike he says 'Gee be jabbers, Ole, I see a peach.' So the Swede he says
lookin' at the silk stockings, 'Mebby you ban see a peach, Mike, but I
ban see one mighty nice pair.' Well, the other day I went to see my
mother-in-law--"

You know the sort of program. I don't say that the people who like them
are not entitled to them, but I do say they are not the sort of programs
to loud-speak from a tomb in a cemetery. I expect old Remington Solander
turned clear over in his tomb when those programs began to come through.
I know our board of trustees went right up in the air, but there was not
a thing we could do about it. The newspapers gave us double pages the
next Sunday--"Remington Solander's Jazz Tomb" and "Westcote's Two-Step
Cemetery." And within a week the inmates of our cemetery began to move
out. Friends of people who had been buried over a hundred years came and
moved them to other cemeteries an