h' choir. First time pa heard 'm he says when he come home, 'That choir
'll never succeed till they dehorn Alvy,' he says.

"Turn over."

[Illustration]

"That's ma's brother-in-law, Livingston Burney, out t' Kansas. He's a
doctor, when he ain't out talkin' politics, which ain't often. He don't
half pervide fer his fambly and onct his boy run away and went clean t'
Chicago to my Aunt Sarah's and when she wrote Burney about it he sent back
a sassy letter, sayin', 'I'll have you know, madam, that I'm th' father of
th' pop'list party in Kansas.' Aunt Sade set right down and wrote him
back, 'If you ain't a better father t' th' party,' she says, 'than you've
been t' this boy, the party's in a bad way,' she says."

[Illustration]

"That's Mrs. Bemrose and her daughter, Lucreshy. They ust t' live
neighbors t' us, but now they've moved t' Yates City. Mrs. Bemrose is a
daisy musician. You'd jist ort t' hear her sing,

"'Oh, th' dirty little coward
That shot Doctor Howard
And laid Jesse James in his grave.'"

[Illustration]

"Them's Willie and Freddie Sparks. They was cute little fellers but it's
awful t' think th' way they turned out, pa says. Willie's an editor and
Freddie's a lawyer, and they work together jist fine. Willie gits into
trouble, and Freddie, he gits him out."

[Illustration]

"Perfessor Leander Crabb, that is. He's principal of th' Ellumwood high
school and he's a tumble coffee drinker--two quart a day when he was
writin' his book, 'Tokens of Hope, or Is This, Then, All?' Pa, he read
th' book through, then he says, 'Well, I hope it is,' he says.

"Turn over."

[Illustration]

"Them's ma's cousin Peter and his wife and baby, down t' Beardstown. He
ain't handsome but he's an awful good man. Pa says onct Cousin Pete was to
a party where there was a game t' give a prize t' th' one what'd make th'
homeliest face, and th' judge walked right over t' Pete and give him th'
prize, and Pete says, supprised like, 'Why, I ain't begun yit,' he says. I
reckon it never reely happened; jist one of pa's jokes, I guess.

"Turn over."

[Illustration]

"That's Cousin Charlie Freemantle--pa's cousin, he is. He's a rollin'
stone--first one place, then another; never satisfied and never gittin'
nothin' ahead. He ust t' be allus comin' 'round tellin' where he was goin'
next and what big things he was goin' t' do when he got there, till ma got
most awful tired of it and says t' him, 'Charlie,' she says, '