he poker is
vacant. Sir, I was bred to the sword and not to the pen, but I have a
foolish desire for literary fame. I should be better pleased to be in
print than to be promoted--for that matter one seems as near as the
other--and my wife agrees with me. She is of a literary turn, and has
helped me in the composition of this, but we both fear that the story
having no moral you will not admit it into your Owlhoots. But if your
wisdom could supply this, or your kindness overlook the defect, it would
afford great consolation to a bereaved family to have printed a
biography of the dear deceased. For we were greatly attached to him,
though he preferred the cook. I can at any rate give you my word as a
man of honour that these incidents are true, though, out of soldierly
modesty, I will not trouble you with my name, but with much respect
subscribe myself by that of

"SLYBOOTS."

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

[Illustration]

The gallant officer is too modest. This biography is not only true but
brief, and these are rare merits in a memoir. As to the moral--it is not
far to seek. Dear children, for whom I hoot! avoid greediness. If
Slyboots had eaten tit-bits in moderation, he might be sitting on the
poker to this day. I have great pleasure in making his brief career
public to the satisfaction of his gallant friend, and I should be glad
to hear that the latter had got his step by the same post as his
Owlhoot.

The second letter is much farther from literary excellence than the
first. I fear this little boy plays truant from school as well as taking
apples which do not belong to him. It is high time that he learnt to
spell, and also to observe the difference between _meum_ and _tuum_.
From not being well grounded on these two points, many boys have lost
good situations in life when they grew up to be men.

"deer mister howl,--as you say you see behind your bak i spose its you
told varmer jones of me for theres a tree with a whole in it just behind
the orchurd he wolloped I shameful and I'll have no more of his apples
they be a deal sowerer than yud think though they look so red, but do
you call yourself a childerns friend and tell tails i dont i can tell
you.

"TOM TURNIP."

Richard Clay & Sons, Ltd., London & Bungay.

The present Series of Mrs. Ewing's Works is the only authorized,
complete, and uniform Edition published.

It will consist of 18 volumes, Small Crown 8vo, at 2s. 6d. per vol.,
issued, as f