early in the words of our English litany, "Battle, and murder,
and sudden death," together with a silver spoon in his mouth at his
natal hour, had made Ahmed a shah; and this Ahmed was the grandfather
of our own pet Soojah. In such a genealogy there is not much for a
poet-laureate to found upon, nor very much to make a saint out of.
Ahmed, after a splendid and tumultuous reign of twenty-six years, died
of cancer in 1773. His son Timour feigned distractedly for twenty
years. Dying in 1793, Timour left a heap of shahzades, amongst whom our
good friend Soojah was almost the youngest. As they call people
Tertius, Septimus, or Vicesimus, from their station in the line of
birth, let us call _him_--Penultimate Soojah Penultimate, if he was, he
could fight as respectably as the rest: and many was the kick he
bestowed on antepenultimate Mahmood. From that year 1793, the zenith of
the French Revolution, in Affghanistan was nothing but fighting for
some ten or fifteen years. Truly a battle royal it was; and if we
cannot report to a fraction the "list of the killed and wounded," we
know the main results. How many of the fraternal combatants leaped upon
the throne, we are not quite sure. Four we can swear to, who were all
pulled out by the ears before they had time to adjust the folds of
their purple. The case of Eteocles and Polynices was a joke to it; and
by the time the row or termashaw was over, and the candles were brought
back amongst this happy family, the following was the state of
matters--two stone blind, three (if not four) stone dead, and two in
exile living upon charity; amongst which last was Penultimate Soojah.
It is proper to mention, by the way, as an appendix to the adventures
of this old friend, that (improving upon his grandpapa's example) he
had run off from his elder brother with the crown jewels; but, like
Colonel Blood in our Charles II.'s reign, he benefited only by the
glory of this distinguished larceny; for soon after, falling amongst
thieves, at the head of whom was our late worthy ally the Seik
Maharajah, Runjeet Singh, he in _his_ turn, was effectually cleaned
out; and, in particular, his silk "wipe," in which he had wrapped up
the famous _Koh-i-noor_, or _summit of glory_, was cleanly forked out
of his fob by the artful dodger, old Runjeet, himself. Here was a
pleasant commentary on the adage of "_Diamond cut Diamond_." The
jewels, originally stolen by Ahmed, were passed on (as in our game of
_Hunt the