ll, sir, when th' feller ridin' her socked in th' spurs, that thar
car humped herself once or twice an' then hit a gait that would make a
U. P. _ex_press look like she was standin' still, an' in less time than
Nebo takes to draw a gun, thar we was at th' top floor, about a mile
higher, I reckon, than folks was ever meant to live.

"An' say! By cripes! when I come to look out o' th' winder in my room, I
thought I'd have to stake myself to th' bed to be safe. Lookin' out was
jest like lookin' down from th' top o' Laramie Peak on th' spread of th'
main range--little ol' peaks an' deep canons everywhere, with
signal-fires throwin' up smoke columns from every peak, like Injuns
signalin' news. She shore looked a rough country to try to make any
short cuts across.

"When I'd got washed up some, I sticks my gun in my waist-band an' goes
out an' down to th' ground on that little ol' upstandin' railroad, an'
axes one o' them soldier boys th' trail to the grub-pile. He grins some
an' takes me into a room so pow'ful big and crowded with folks I allowed
'bout everybody in town must be eatin' there.

"Soon as I got sot down, here comes a coon an' hands me a printed sheet
bigger'n th' _Llano Weekly Clarion_. An' when I told him I was much
obliged, but I'd come to eat an' not to read, blamed ef that thar coon
didn't think o' somethin' so funny he nigh split hisself. 'Pears like
mos' everybody has a most onusual lot of laugh in 'em back thar.

"Wall, bein' dod-burned hungry, an' allowin' I'd have a bang-up feed,
an' rememberin' you Yankees talkin' on th' round-up 'bout what slick
eatin' lobsters makes, I tells th' coon to bring me a dozen lobsters an'
a cup of coffee.

"'Wha-what's dat you say, boss? How many lobsters does you want?' says
th' coon.

"'A plumb dozen, you black hash-slinger!' says I, 'an' hump yourself
_pronto_, for my tape-worm's hollerin' for fodder.'

"Off slides Mr. Coon, lookin' at me sorta scared-like outen th' corner
o' his off eye, to the far end o' th' room.

"Wall, thar I set for about twenty minutes, hopin' lobsters was bigger'n
oysters an' wonderin' ef I'd ordered enough to fill up me an' th' worm,
when, lookin' up, here comes up th' room a p'rcession of twelve niggers,
each nigger carryin' a plate about half th' size of a saddle-blanket,
an' on each plate a whale of a big red critter, most all laigs an'
claws, that looked like a overgrowed Gila monster with war-paint on.

"An' when th' lead coon sto