"'Pard,' he says, puffin', 'I'm much obleeged to you. I reckon I sure
ain't treated you right. If it hadn't been for you that time I'd----'

"But I was bilin' over. I whirled on him like a teetotum.

"'Drat your hide!' I says. 'When you speak to your officer you say sir!
And now you go for'ard and light them lights. Don't you answer back! If
you do I'll fix you so's you'll never ship aboard another vessel!
For'ard there! Lively, you lubber, lively!'

"He went for'ard, takin' considerable time and hangin' on for dear life.
But somehow or 'nuther he got the lights to goin'; and all the time I
hazed him terrible. I was mate on an Australian packet afore I went
fishin' to the Banks, and I can haze some. I blackguarded that shover
awful.

"'Ripperty-rip your everlastin' blankerty-blanked dough-head!' I roared
at him. 'You ain't wuth the weight to sink you. For'ard there and get
that fog-horn to goin'! And keep it goin'! Lively, you sculpin! Don't
you open your mouth to me!'

"Well, all night we sloshed along, straight acrost the bay. We must have
been a curious sight to look at. The floats was awash, so that the
automobile looked like she was ridin' the waves all by her lonesome; the
lamps was blazin' at either side of the bow; Billings was a tootin' the
rubber fog-horn as if he was wound up; and I was standin' on the
cushions amidships, keepin' the whole calabash afore the wind.

"We never met another craft the whole night through. Yes, we did meet
one. Old Ezra Cahoon, of Harnis, was out in his dory stealin' quahaugs
from Seth Andrews's bed over nigh the Wapatomac shore. Ezra stayed long
enough to get one good glimpse of us as we bust through the fog; then he
cut his rodin' and laid to his oars, bound for home and mother. We could
hear him screech for half an hour after he left us.

"Ez told next day that the devil had come ridin' acrost the bay after
him in a chariot of fire. Said he could smell the brimstone and hear the
trumpet callin' him to judgment. Likewise he hove in a lot of
particulars concernin' the personal appearance of the Old Boy himself,
who, he said, was standin' up wavin' a redhot pitchfork. Some folks
might have been flattered at bein' took for such a famous character; but
I wan't; I'm retirin' by nature, and, besides, Ez's description wan't
cal'lated to bust a body's vanity-biler. I was prouder of the
consequences, the same bein' that Ezra signed the Good Templars' pledge
that afternoon, and k