ng forms this
ambition was in all his life.

Another incident of these days will exhibit aspirations of a more solemn
import that were not less part of his nature. It was depth of sentiment
rather than clearness of faith which kept safe the belief on which they
rested against all doubt or question of its sacredness, but every year
seemed to strengthen it in him. This was told me in his second letter
after reaching the Peschiere; the first having sent me some such
commissions in regard to his wife's family as his kindly care for all
connected with him frequently led to. "Let me tell you," he wrote (30th
of September), "of a curious dream I had, last Monday night; and of the
fragments of reality I can collect; which helped to make it up. I have
had a return of rheumatism in my back, and knotted round my waist like a
girdle of pain; and had laid awake nearly all that night under the
infliction, when I fell asleep and dreamed this dream. Observe that
throughout I was as real, animated, and full of passion as Macready (God
bless him!) in the last scene of _Macbeth_. In an indistinct place,
which was quite sublime in its indistinctness, I was visited by a
Spirit. I could not make out the face, nor do I recollect that I desired
to do so. It wore a blue drapery, as the Madonna might in a picture by
Raphael; and bore no resemblance to any one I have known except in
stature. I think (but I am not sure) that I recognized the voice.
Anyway, I knew it was poor Mary's spirit. I was not at all afraid, but
in a great delight, so that I wept very much, and stretching out my arms
to it called it 'Dear.' At this, I thought it recoiled; and I felt
immediately, that not being of my gross nature, I ought not to have
addressed it so familiarly. 'Forgive me!' I said. 'We poor living
creatures are only able to express ourselves by looks and words. I have
used the word most natural to _our_ affections; and you know my heart.'
It was so full of compassion and sorrow for me--which I knew
spiritually, for, as I have said, I didn't perceive its emotions by its
face--that it cut me to the heart; and I said, sobbing, 'Oh! give me
some token that you have really visited me!' 'Form a wish,' it said. I
thought, reasoning with myself: 'If I form a selfish wish, it will
vanish.' So I hastily discarded such hopes and anxieties of my own as
came into my mind, and said, 'Mrs. Hogarth is surrounded with great
distresses'--observe, I never thought of saying 'yo