this
gentleman takes nothing on trust--likes to see everything for himself;
he observes a good deal more than he ever says anything about. His
nose is wide at the tip, showing a trustful and confiding disposition;
it has a bump in the centre, denoting a moderate amount of
combativeness. The nostrils indicate a keen sense of humour. (_Here_
JACK _giggles bashfully._) There is a twist in the upper lip,
which indicates--well, I won't say that he would actually tell an
_untruth_--but if he had the opportunity for doing so, he has the
capacity for taking advantage of it. I think that is all I have to say
about this Gentleman.

_Flossie_ (_to_ JACK, _after he has returned to her side_). JACK, if
you can't leave off having an original and inquiring mind, you must at
least promise me _one_ thing--it's very little to ask!

_Jack._ You know I'd do any blessed thing in the world for you
FLOSSIE,--what is it?

_Flossie._ Only to wear an elastic round your ears at night, JACK!

_The Unsophisticated Father_ (_at the conclusion of the exhibition,
as the Missing Lady disappears with a bang, in full view of the
Audience_). There, VIVVIE; she's vanished clean away. What do you say
to that, eh?

_Vivien_ (_composedly_). Well, I think we may as well vanish too
Father. It's all over!

_The S. L._ (_going out_). I don't wish to judge _others_--far from
it--but, speaking for myself, ELIZA, I _cannot_ feel this has been
a profitable method of employing precious moments which can never be
recalled.

_Her Friend._ Oh, it's quite early. You'll have plenty of time to get
a cup of tea, and do some shopping before it's dark.

_The S. L._ (_severely_). That was not precisely what I _meant_,
ELIZA!

[_But it is precisely what she does._

* * * * *

ADVERTISEMENT'S ADVERSARIES.

["A Society has been formed to deliver us from hideous
advertisements."

_The Saturday Review._]

O newly-formed Society, we note with admiration
The truly novel purpose which you seem to have at heart,
And with no little eagerness await its consummation,
When popular advertisements will shine as works of art.

Then picturesque localities no longer will be crowded
With puffs of panaceas for our universal ills,
No longer will the atmosphere be permanently clouded
By sky-signs built to promulgate a patent soap or pills.

No more in train or omnibus will every inch of boarding
Be covered with ad