iments, and
hobnobbing to himself without intermission. After a sufficiently tedious
interval, the long succession of wasteful extravagance is cleared away
with the upper tablecloth; the dowagers, at a look from our hostess,
rise with dignity and decorously retire, miss modestly bringing up the
rear--the man at the foot of the table with the handle of the door in
one hand, and a napkin in the other, bowing them out.

Now the host sings out to the Honourable Sniftky to draw his chair
closer and be jovial, as if people, after an oppressively expensive
dinner, can be jovial _to order_. The wine goes round, and laudations go
with it; the professed diners-out enquire the vintage; the Honourable Mr
Sniftky intrenches himself behind a rampart of fruit dishes, speaking
only when he is spoken to, and glancing inquisitively at the several
speakers, as much as to say, "What a fellow you are, to talk;" the host
essays a _bon-mot_, or tells a story bordering on the _ideal_, which he
thinks is fashionable, and shows that he knows life; the Honourable
Sniftky drinks claret from a beer-glass, and after the third bottle
affects to discover his mistake, wondering what he could be thinking of;
this produces much laughter from all save the professed diners-out, who
dare not take such a liberty, and is _the_ jest of the evening.

When the drinkers, drinkables, and talk are quite exhausted, the noise
of a piano recalls to our bewildered recollections the ladies, and we
drink their healths: the Honourable Sniftky, pretending that it is
foreign-post night at the Foreign Office, walks off without even a bow
to the assembled diners, the gentility-monger following him submissively
to the door; then returning, tells us that he's sorry Sniftky's gone,
he's such a good-natured fellow, while the gentleman so characterized
gets into his cab, drives to his club, and excites the commiseration of
every body there, by relating how he was bored with an old _ruffian_,
who insisted upon his (Sniftky's) going to dinner in Bryanston Square;
at which there are many "Oh's!" and "Ah's!" and "what could you
expect?--Bryanston Square!--served you right."

In the mean time, the guests, relieved of the presence of the Honourable
Sniftky, are rather more at their ease; a baronet (who was lord mayor,
or something of that sort) waxes jocular, and gives decided indications
of something like "how came you so;" the man at the foot of the table
contradicts one of the dine