DY TWOMBLEY.
In mercy's name why don't you retire quietly to your room and pack?
MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.
What! Throw up the sponge?
LADY TWOMBLEY.
You needn't throw up your sponge--_pack_ your sponge.
MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.
I understand, Lady T--hook it!
LADY TWOMBLEY.
"Hook it" is a harsh way of putting it. Bring your visit to a close.
Think of what you are losing here! Think of Margate, where I feel you
must have many dear friends!
MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.
I--I've half a mind to.
LADY TWOMBLEY.
Ha! Bless you, Mr. Lebanon, bless you! I'll fetch you a Bradshaw.
MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.
Stop! I forgot the hop.
LADY TWOMBLEY.
The hop?
MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.
There's a ball here to-morrow night.
LADY TWOMBLEY.
For heaven's sake, don't wait for the hop.
MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.
I had half-a-dozen lessons in the Scotch Reel before I left town.
LADY TWOMBLEY.
And you would risk the Reel on half-a-dozen lessons! Madman!
MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.
Half-a-dozen lessons at store prices. Dash it all, you wouldn't 'ave me
waste 'em!
LADY TWOMBLEY.
Hopeless!
[SIR JULIAN enters unobserved by Lebanon or LADY TWOMBLEY.]
MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.
Look 'ere, Lady T! I'm sorry to disappoint a lady, but it ain't Mr.
Joseph Lebanon's principle to do something for nothing.
LADY TWOMBLEY.
No. If you lent a lady your arm you'd do it at interest.
MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.
I'm not alludin' to our pleasant financial relationship, Lady T. What I
infer is that if after the forthcoming hop I drag myself away from my
sorrowin' friends at Drumdurris I expect a--ah--a solatium. [SIR JULIAN
remains watching and listening.]
LADY TWOMBLEY.
A what?
MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.
Lady T, my pride has been wounded in this 'ouse--my self-respect has
been 'urt.
LADY TWOMBLEY.
Ha, ha, ha! Pardon me, I'm hysterical.
MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.
If you could 'eal my feelings by rendering me a service----
LADY TWOMBLEY.
To be rid of you?
MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.
Oh, Lady T, 'ow plainly you put it! Well, yes.
LADY TWOMBLEY.
Try me. [SIR JULIAN disappears suddenly.]
MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.
'Ush! Thought I 'eard somebody. Lady T, you are aware that Mr. Joseph
Lebanon's position in the financial world is an eminent one.
LADY TWOMBLEY.
I wasn't aware of it.
MR. JOSEPH LEBANON.
Take it from me, Lady T, take it from me. But that distinguished
position might be advanced by the success of some delicate litt
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