ad of vegetables. Why, a farm near a big city like this, if
it was run right, ought to just coin money."

I am teaching, the boys to dance. You would kill yourself a laughing
watching them. After supper we push the kitchen table back, cause the
kitchen is a big old-fashioned kind, and Tom takes off his coat, because
he goes at it as if he was going to saw a load of lumber, and Jack runs
the phonograph and I try to teach Tom to dance, but you might just as
well teach an elephant to walk a tight rope. Tom is all feet. To begin
with, he is six feet two, and I come to about the second button on his
coat, and I have an awful time trying to get him around. He tries so
hard, he puckers his face all up in worried lines, and he sweats and he
breathes hard, and then when he gets through, he falls into a chair just
done up, mops his face and the back of his neck with a handkerchief or a
handy towel, and says, "Talk about work, why I would rather load a dray
all day." Then when he gets cooled off, he runs the phonograph for Jack.
Jack dances lovely. He is awful light on his feet. You don't have to
show him a step but once when he knows it, but he don't care much for
dancing, not half as much as Tom does, who would never learn the tango
if he lived a thousand years. But it is funny to see Tom. When Jack is a
dancing Tom will take an onion and go in front of Tom, holding it just
out of reach and moving just as Jack moves, as if he was trying to chase
the onion. When I say Jack is a good dancer, Tom says, "Sure, he is,
cause he thinks he is chasing an onion. Now if we only had a pig, no
tellin' what he'd do."

The one that can beat them all out is Mrs. Cassidy. At first she
wouldn't get up and try, and said, "The likes of an old woman like me
dancing around," but I gave her a great line of talk, told her how all
the old ladies was dancing, that if she went down to the restaurants
where I danced, she would see women old enough to be her grandmother,
having the time of their lives. First she wouldn't listen to it, and
said, "Gwan, they are trying to make a fool of me in my old age," but
finally I got her to try, and say, she done grand. Like all Irish girls,
she used to dance when she was young, and it all come back to her, and
she took to the new steps just natural. It was fun to see her. Her face
flushed, her eyes got bright, and she didn't seem to be old no more. Tom
and Jack were tickled to death. When she got through, they clapped