y all
treat each other in such extraordinary ways, that I could only perceive
that English young ladies and English young gentlemen, if they behaved in
Canton as they do at home, would speedily be consigned to the
lockup-house. But at last I was glad to recognise Lord Charles, disguised
in top-boots and knee-breeches as a groom, and I was very proud of my
cleverness in recognizing him; for his own father speaks to him for a long
time, and never makes the discovery; and shortly after, Mr Littleton Coke
appears, also disguised as a groom, but for what purpose I could not find
out. And there was a long time employed in love-making again, and
quarrelling and mistaking, till at last all things seemed to go right, and
the old Bonze united the hands of the lovers on the stage, and we all
laughed and clapped our hands. Of a truth, O Cho-Ling-Kyang! the persons
who find fault with the drama are foolish. It is not with the drama such
critics should find fault, but with the people who believe in real life in
such a curious manner. No--it will not do to throw the blame of such
representations on the author. He does nothing but paint what he sees. And
therefore you will be wise if you send over to this people an ambassador
who is not of the sect of the moral Con-fu-tse; for as he will have to mix
in the society of Lady Alices and Countesses of Pompions, he might be
shocked and degraded by meeting them, if he had any regard for female
delicacy or manly feeling. It will not require a man of the abilities of
the venerated Chang-Feu to twist round his thumb so very stupid a mortal
as the Earl of Pompion, who is secretary of state; and, therefore, you may
save much silver by engaging a common Button to conduct the negotiations
with the English crown. I could see no one on the stage, or meet with any
one in the books, bearing any resemblance to Pottinger or Davis; and,
therefore, I suppose all the clever men are banished by this curious
people, and all the silly ones kept at home. You will therefore be wise to
make your treaties with the Pompions, who reside in Whitehall, rather than
with the Goughs and Parkers, who are transported to Hong-Kong. In the mean
time I will continue my researches, and I will also make personal
experiments as to the veracity of the stage representations. I will go at
once to one of the great men's houses, and will kiss his wife in a week,
and disguise myself like a postilion, and run away with one of his
daughter