ng it to him. We intended to give it to the
Honolulu Girls around at the Walnut Theatre, they looked a bit
goose-fleshed last week, but we always have hay fever when we get near
those grass skirts. Grass widows is what the profession calls the
Hawaiian ladies. Hope the temperature isn't going up again. We love the
old-fashioned Christmas and all that sort of thing. Nipping air makes
cheeks pink; we love to see them nestled in fur coats on Chestnut
Street. This is the time of year to do unexpected kindnesses. We know
one man who stands in line for hours in front of movie theatres just in
order to shout _Merry Christmas_ through the little hole in the glass.
Shaving seems less of a bore. Newspapers are supposed to be heartless,
but they all take a hand in trying to help poor children. Find ourselves
humming hymn tunes. Very odd, haven't been to a church for years. Great
fun surprising people. We've been reading the new phone book; noticed
several ways in which people might surprise each other by calling up and
wishing many happy returns of the day. Why doesn't Beulah R. Wine ring
up Mrs. Louis F. Beer, for instance? Or, A. D. Smoker and Burton J.
Puffer might go around to W. C. Matchett, tobacconist, at 1635 South
Second Street, and buy their Christmas cigars. George Wharton Pepper
might give Mayme Salt a ring (on the phone, that is). What a pleasant
voice that telephone operatrix has. Here's to you, child, and many of
them. Grand time, Christmas.

* * * * *

Fine old Anglo-Saxon festival, Christmas. A time of jovial cheer and
bracing mirth. Must be so, because Doctor Frank Crane and Ralph Waldo
Trine have often said so. Christmas hard on people like that, however:
they are bursting with the Christmas spirit all the year round; very
trying when the real occasion comes. That's the beauty of having a
peevish and surly disposition: when one softens up at Christmas
everybody notices it and is pleased. Chaucer, fine old English poet,
first English humorist, gave good picture of Christmas cheer more than
five hundred years ago. Never quoted on Christmas cards, why not copy it
here? Chaucer's spelling very like Ring Lardner's, but good sort just
the same. Says he:

And this was, as thise bookes me remembre,
The colde, frosty sesoun of Decembre....
The bittre frostes with the sleet and reyn
Destroyed hath the grene in every yard;
Janus sit by the fyre with double beard,