e. It's one of his great days, I think, Ermyntrude. I feel sure it
is. One of those days that has given us all this money, and all these
fine houses, with all those little birds that his gentlemen friends
shoot. He has an idea!

ERMYNTRUDE: O, mother, do you really think so?

MRS. SLADDER: I'm sure of it, child. (_Looking out._) There! There he
is! Walking along that path that they made. I can see he's got an idea.
How like Napoleon.[*] He's walking with Mr. Splurge. They're coming in
now. Come along, Ermyntrude, we mustn't disturb him to-day. He has some
great idea, some great idea.

[Footnote *: (N.B.--SLADDER _is not in the very least like Napoleon._)]

ERMYNTRUDE: How splendid, mother! What do you think it is?

MRS. SLADDER: Ah. I could never explain it to you, even if I knew. It is
business, child, business. It isn't everybody that can understand
business.

ERMYNTRUDE: I hear them coming, mother.

MRS. SLADDER: There must be things we can never understand: things too
deep for us like. And business is the most wonderful of them all.

[_Exeunt R._

[_Enter_ SLADDER _and_ SPLURGE _through the window, which opens on to
the lawn, down a step or two._

SLADDER: Now, Splurge, we must do some business.

SPLURGE: Yes, sir.

SLADDER: Sit down, Splurge.

SPLURGE: Thank you, sir.

SLADDER: Splurge, I am going to say to you now, what I couldn't talk
about with all those gardeners hanging about. And, by the way, Splurge,
haven't we bought rather too many gardeners?

SPLURGE: No, sir. The Earl of Etheldune has seven; we had to go one
better than him, sir.

SLADDER: Certainly, Splurge, certainly.

SPLURGE: So I bought ten for you, sir, to be on the safe side.

SLADDER: Ah, quite right, Splurge, quite right. There seemed to be
rather a lot, but that's quite right. Well, now to business.

SPLURGE: Yes, sir.

SLADDER: I told you I'd invented a new name for a food.

SPLURGE: Yes, sir. Cheezo.

SLADDER: Well, what have you been able to do about it?

SPLURGE: I've had some nice little posters done, sir. I'm having it well
written up. I've got some samples here, and it looks like doing very
well indeed.

SLADDER: Ah!

SPLURGE: It's a grand name, if I may say so, sir. It sounds so
classical-like with that "O" at the end; and yet anyone can see what
it's derived from, even if he's never learnt anything. It suggests
cheese to them every time.

SLADDER: Let's see your samples.

SPLURGE: Well, sir, here's