th,"
"Cardinal Wolsey, in his old age, left naked to his enemies._"--Yours,
_artfully_, A SHAKSPEARIAN READER, BUT NO LATIN SCHOLAR.

* * * * *

[Illustration: A PARLIAMENTARY ASIDE.

FRIENDLY VISITOR (_effusively_). "IT IS INDEED A BE-UTIFUL CHE-ILD!
(_Aside._) _FLABBY, DABBY BABBY!!_"]

* * * * *

"KNOWLEDGE IS INVALUABLE!"

SCENE--_Royal Commission of the Future. Commissioners present.
Last Witness under examination._

_Chairman_. And now, my lad, you have learned everything.

_Witness_ (_modestly_). Yes, my Lord and Gentlemen, up to a certain
point.

_Chairman_. Quite so--you have, generally speaking, an education
rather better than an average City Clerk?

_Witness_ (_in the same modest tone_). So I am given to understand.

_Chairman_. What is your father?

_Witness_. An artisan. But pardon me, I think I can anticipate and
answer the next question. I am entirely unfit to follow my parent's
calling--physically and morally. My frame has been weakened by study,
and my education prevents--.

_Chairman_ (_interrupting_). Just so. We can hardly expect a lad of
fourteen who is good enough to floor the London matriculation taking
to bricklaying? (_Murmurs of general assent_.) Well, my boy, have you
tried to get a clerkship?

_Witness_. Alas! yes, indeed I have, my Lord and Gentlemen. I have
tried everywhere to obtain employment, but without success.

_Chairman_ (_sympathetically_). Dear me! Very sad! But come, my
lad, we have given you something more than an ordinary commercial
education--you have acquired accomplishments.

_Witness_. Yes, my Lord and Gentlemen; but, believe me, they are
valueless. I am an excellent violinist, but there is no room for me at
the theatres. It is true I might, by paying my footing, secure a place
in a strolling band, consisting of a harp and a cornet, but I have
conscientious scruples against earnings gained at the doors of a
public-house.

_Chairman_. Certainly. Besides, I fancy you make too light of the
difficulties of securing such a position. A Witness, who gave very
much the same evidence as yourself, declared it was impossible to gain
admission even to a German Band. But you have learned drawing?

_Witness_. Yes; but I find the accomplishment valueless as a
bread-winner. I would do pastels on the flag-stones were not the
supply of artists in this particular line greatly in excess of the
demand.