lainly shews, may
it please your worships, that the decay of eloquence, and the little
good service it does at present, both within and without doors, is
owing to nothing else in the world, but short coats, and the disuse of
trunk-hose.--We can conceal nothing under ours, Madam, worth shewing.

Chapter 2.VIII.

Dr. Slop was within an ace of being an exception to all this
argumentation: for happening to have his green baize bag upon his knees,
when he began to parody my uncle Toby--'twas as good as the best mantle
in the world to him: for which purpose, when he foresaw the sentence
would end in his new-invented forceps, he thrust his hand into the bag
in order to have them ready to clap in, when your reverences took so
much notice of the..., which had he managed--my uncle Toby had certainly
been overthrown: the sentence and the argument in that case jumping
closely in one point, so like the two lines which form the salient angle
of a ravelin,--Dr. Slop would never have given them up;--and my uncle
Toby would as soon have thought of flying, as taking them by force: but
Dr. Slop fumbled so vilely in pulling them out, it took off the whole
effect, and what was a ten times worse evil (for they seldom come alone
in this life) in pulling out his forceps, his forceps unfortunately drew
out the squirt along with it.

When a proposition can be taken in two senses--'tis a law in
disputation, That the respondent may reply to which of the two he
pleases, or finds most convenient for him.--This threw the advantage of
the argument quite on my uncle Toby's side.--'Good God!' cried my uncle
Toby, 'are children brought into the world with a squirt?'

Chapter 2.IX.

--Upon my honour, Sir, you have tore every bit of skin quite off the
back of both my hands with your forceps, cried my uncle Toby--and you
have crush'd all my knuckles into the bargain with them to a jelly. 'Tis
your own fault, said Dr. Slop--you should have clinch'd your two fists
together into the form of a child's head as I told you, and sat firm.--I
did so, answered my uncle Toby.--Then the points of my forceps have not
been sufficiently arm'd, or the rivet wants closing--or else the cut on
my thumb has made me a little aukward--or possibly--'Tis well, quoth my
father, interrupting the detail of possibilities--that the experiment
was not first made upon my child's head-piece.--It would not have been a
cherry-stone the worse, answered Dr. Slop.--I maintain it,