rdinarily astonished at the
liberality of the governor."

"Seriously, I think the governor is ill. For the last ten days he has
scarcely been recognisable; his cheeks are so furrowed you could hide
your fist in them."

"And so absent; you should just see him. The other day he lifted his
spectacles to read a deed, and his eyes were as red and glaring as fiery
coals."

"He was right. 'Short reckonings make long friends!'"

"Let me say a word. I will tell you, gentlemen, something very strange.
I handed this deed to the governor, and it was topsy-turvy."

"The governor? How strange! What could he mean by topsy-turvying thus?
Enough to choke him, unless, as you say, his habits are so completely
altered."

"Oh, what a fellow you are, Chalamel! I say I gave him the deed wrong
end up'ards."

"Wasn't he in a rage?"

"Not the slightest. He did not even notice it, but kept his great red
eyes fixed upon it for at least ten minutes, and then handed me back the
deed, saying, 'Very good!'"

"What, still topsy-turvy?"

"Yes."

"Then he couldn't have read it?"

"_Pardieu!_ not unless he can read upside down."

"How odd!"

"The governor looked so dull and cross at the moment that I did not dare
to say a word, and so I left him, just as if nothing had occurred."

"Well, four days ago I was in the head clerk's office; there came a
client, then two or three clients with whom the governor had
appointments. They got tired of waiting; and, at their request, I went
and knocked at his study door. No answer; so in I went."

"Well?"

"M. Jacques Ferrand had his arms crossed on his desk, and his bald and
not overdelicate forehead leaning on his hands. He never stirred."

"Was he asleep?"

"I thought so, and went towards him: 'Sir, there are clients waiting
with whom you have made appointments.' He didn't stir. 'Sir!' No answer.
Then I touched his shoulder, and he bounced up as if the devil had
bitten him. In his start his large green spectacles fell from his eyes
on to his nose, and I saw--you'll never believe it--"

"Well, what?"

"Tears."

"Oh, what nonsense!"

"Quite true."

"What! the governor snivel? No, I won't have that."

"When that's the case why cockchafers will play the cornet-a-piston."

"And cocks and hens wear top-boots."

"Ta, ta, ta, ta; all your folly will not prevent my having seen what I
did see as plain as I see you."

"Weeping?"

"Yes, weeping. And he was in such a precious rage at bei