e in reading the contents; for when Solomon brought
up the note on the silver tea-tray as usual, my aunt, seeing Mr.
Preston's seal and name at the corner of the letter (which is the common
way of writing adopted by those official gents)--my aunt, I say, seeing
his name and seal, cried, "_Now_, Mary, who is right?" and betted my wife
a sixpence that the envelope contained an invitation to dinner. She
never paid the sixpence, though she lost, but contented herself by
abusing Mary all day, and said I was a poor-spirited sneak for not
instantly horsewhipping Mr. P. A pretty joke, indeed! They would have
hanged me in those days, as they did the man who shot Mr. Perceval.
And now I should be glad to enlarge upon that experience in genteel life
which I obtained through the perseverance of Mrs. Hoggarty; but it must
be owned that my opportunities were but few, lasting only for the brief
period of six months: and also, genteel society has been fully described
already by various authors of novels, whose names need not here be set
down, but who, being themselves connected with the aristocracy, viz., as
members of noble families, or as footmen or hangers-on thereof, naturally
understand their subject a great deal better than a poor young fellow
from a fire-office can.
There was our celebrated adventure in the Opera House, whither Mrs. H.
would insist upon conducting us; and where, in a room of the
establishment called the crush-room, where the ladies and gents after the
music and dancing await the arrival of their carriages (a pretty figure
did our little Solomon cut, by the way, with his big cane, among the
gentlemen of the shoulder-knot assembled in the lobby!)--where, I say, in
the crush-room, Mrs. H. rushed up to old Lady Drum, whom I pointed out to
her, and insisted upon claiming relationship with her Ladyship. But my
Lady Drum had only a memory when she chose, as I may say, and had
entirely on this occasion thought fit to forget her connection with the
Titmarshes and Hoggarties. Far from recognising us, indeed, she called
Mrs. Hoggarty an "ojus 'oman," and screamed out as loud as possible for a
police-officer.
This and other rebuffs made my aunt perceive the vanities of this wicked
world, as she said, and threw her more and more into really serious
society. She formed several very valuable acquaintances, she said, at
the Independent Chapel; and among others, lighted upon her friend of the
Rookery, Mr. Grimes Wapsh
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