esen will
take your place this morning."
Johnsen sat down again, entirely crestfallen. He felt that he had been
hopelessly outwitted and beaten. The dean's sonorous voice still rolled
on. He did not directly attack any particular point in the sermon--not
at all; but he showed how earthly love, although it was but the type of
a heavenly one, was often apt to lead us mortals into error. This he
knew of his own experience. He did not wish to make himself out better
than he was, but he felt that it was of the highest importance for all,
and especially for the young, to be constantly on their guard against
the danger. Johnsen could see for himself to what lengths he had allowed
himself to be carried yesterday.
"There is, however, one thing," continued the dean, "in which you show
very great merit, my dear young friend, and for this very reason I have
had, and I may say still have, great hopes of you. What I speak of is
your integrity, and the natural leaning towards truth and sincerity,
which seems to pervade your whole nature. But, my dear friend, how can a
man claim to be sincere when he comes forward and cries, 'I love truth
beyond everything, and my heart is full of love for what is elevated and
pure,' and then it appears all the time that the love with which his
heart was full is nothing more than an earthly love for the woman who
has put these thoughts into his mind? Now, can you deny that this was
your case yesterday?"
Johnsen could not exactly deny the accusation, and the dean seized upon
the half-confession he had made, and continued his homily, without
betraying a sign of weariness. And when he at last took his leave, which
was not till nearly twelve o'clock, he said, "I will look in again this
afternoon. Your thoughts are doubtless so much occupied that you will
not go out to-day, and perhaps it would look quite as well if you stayed
at home."
The next day also Johnsen remained in his room, and the dean paid him a
visit, both morning and afternoon. At length, all at once, his
conversion was accomplished. In a moment it seemed clear to him by how
little he had escaped getting on the wrong path, and now all the
apprehensions which he had felt on his first visit to Sandsgaard again
reappeared. He felt how near he had been to forgetting and abandoning
his mission--that mission among the poor, which was really his duty; but
now his eyes were opened, and that very affection, the strength of which
he had now onl
|